Quil's Resolve
by Roses in May
Summary: SEQUEL TO QUIL'S GUILT. As Quil's resolve begins to falter he pushes Claire away. Can he overcome his fears, or will his hesitation tear them apart.
1. Begin

**So there was so much stuff still rattling around in my brain from my first story, I decided to continue it. If you haven't read Quil's Guilt, you might want to as I refer back to that story quite a bit. **

**I also want to thank everyone who reviewed my first story. I was very nervous about posting it and was glad no one wrote to say they hated it! I hope you enjoy this one too. I won't beg you guys for reviews, but they are nice ego boosts. Of course you are more than welcome to tell me you hate it as well. Either way, let me know what you think, I'd appreciate it!**

**Just on a personal note: The character of Claire's mother was named after a very dear friend of mine, Sherry, who passed away in September 2007 from brain cancer. Sherry was like a second mother to me and I miss her every day!**

**I don't own anything, I'm just borrowing it for a little while.**

**All the chapters in this story are taken from song titles. This chapter is from the song "Begin" by Ben Lee from the album "Awake is the New Asleep".**

**Okay I've blabbed enough. So read and I hope you enjoy!**

**-Roses in May-**

* * *

"So I've been thinking a lot about this supervised dating thing." Claire said.

It had been nearly a month since Sharon Ortecho, Claire's mom had brought up the concept of 'supervised dating'. In essence Quil and Claire would be allowed to date as long as there was a chaperone present. Quil wasn't sure he liked the whole idea to much. It wasn't so much that he minded someone coming along on his dates with Claire, but that he just still wasn't very keen on the idea of them dating at all yet. As much as she had grown up in the last few years, Claire was still only fourteen. In the back of his mind, he couldn't get rid of the voice that swirled in his head saying 'she's too young'. Of course he thought that could also be leftover pack mind reading, because every time he had patrolled over the last month Sam made a point of thinking _she's too young_. It was enough to drive Quil crazy. The good news was that Claire had been so absorbed in her school activities, she hadn't mentioned dating in weeks. Quil had begun to think she had decided to back burner the idea. That was until two seconds ago.

"You have, huh?" Quil cursed mentally.

"Yes. I think it's a good idea and we should do it."

"You do, huh?"

"Yes. In fact, I think we should start as soon as possible. Because what I figure is supervised dating will very soon lead to unsupervised dating which means we can just be alone, like we used to be, but dating." Claire smiled, pleased with her reasoning.

Quil barked out a laugh. "You think it will be just that simple huh?" He loved Claire's ability to manipulate an idea to suit her expectations.

"Why wouldn't it? My mom loves you and my dad…"

"Your dad would probably like to see me castrated."

Claire shrugged. "Well that's neither here nor there, and besides, his new job has him traveling almost five days a week now."

Claire's father worked for the BIA. He had just recently been promoted as an assistant to the Assistant Secretary of the Interior for Indian Affairs and now traveled almost constantly, leaving Claire home with her older sister Grace and her mother Sharon.

"Think about it Quil, I mean I'm going to be fifteen soon. I can't be the only freshman without a boyfriend." Claire looked at Quil and gave him her best pout.

"Number one I'm sure you are not the only freshman who doesn't have a boyfriend. I mean chess club alone must have some singles. Number two, who says I want to be your boyfriend anyway?"

Claire smiled suggestively. Her hand reached out and she brushed her fingers along the inside of Quil's thigh.

Quil closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. "You really shouldn't do that when I'm driving." He tried to sound upset, but the cracking in his voice gave him away.

"Why is it…..distracting you?" She let her fingers travel up between Quil's legs, but he snatched her hand before it got anywhere and pushed it away.

"Don't." He muttered.

"God Quil, you are such a prude." Claire flopped back in her seat, arms crossed in front of her chest, pout firmly in place.

"I'm not a prude, I just…."

"I know, I know, it's not right etcetera, etcetera," Claire grumbled.

Quil looked over and tried not to smile at the scowl that was on his girl's face. His imprint had always been difficult, but over the last month or so, she had gone into full on teenage mode.

"Claire Bear don't pout. It's unbecoming."

Claire turned and stuck her tongue out at Quil.

"Well that's mature," he snorted.

When she didn't respond Quil just rolled his eyes. He'd let her pout for now. She'd get over it soon enough.

As they rode in silence, Quil concentrated on enjoying the scenery. It was the middle of fall and for once it wasn't raining. The air was cool and drenched with that crisp autumn scent - a mixture of burning leaves and dew moistened grass - and with his heightened senses, Quil couldn't help but smile at the way those smells mingled together with the dominating scent of salt from the ocean. His enjoyment of the weather almost made him forget about their argument until he went to say something about it to Claire and looked over to see the scowl still fixed firmly on her face. He thought better of opening his mouth. He felt bad that he and Claire had argued, even though he remained convinced he was in the right. However he also felt an ache in his chest that she was upset with him. The silence started to weigh on him and as he pulled into Claire's driveway the ache started to become unbearable. Claire reached for her door handle, but Quil grabbed her arm.

"Hey, I don't want you to get out when you're still mad at me."

"Then I guess we're just going to sit here," Claire snapped.

"What's the matter Claire Bear? Don't you love me anymore?" Quil fluttered his eyelashes at Claire and clasped his hands beneath his chin.

Claire gave him an exasperated look, but he could see her beginning to crack.

"Come on, forgive me?"

"Quil, I was trying to have a serious discussion about our dating future and you just blew it off."

"I didn't blow it off. I just….we can't have a serious discussion with your hand in my crotch."

"UH! My hand was not in your crotch!"

"Not for lack of trying," Quil pointed out.

"Well it doesn't matter. I don't want to talk about it with you anymore."

"No?"

"No."

"So does this mean you don't want me to be your boyfriend?"

Claire shot him a glare and sniffed. "Right now I'm thinking no."

"No?"

"Nope."

"Hmm that's a shame. I mean I don't know too many girl's whose boyfriends can do this." Quil grabbed Claire around the waist, pulled her across the front seats and out of the car. He threw her over his shoulder and began marching towards her house.

Claire, shrieking and laughing, pounded on Quil's back with her fists. "Put me down!"

"What? I can't hear you!"

"I said put me down!"

Quil stepped onto the porch, gave Claire a playful swat on her rear and set her on her feet.

While she fixed her clothes, Quil looked down at her and sighed. "Don't be mad at me okay?"

Claire shook her head and smiled. "You know I can never stay mad at you." She moved forward and wrapped her arms around Quil's waist, snuggling her head into his stomach.

Quil rubbed Claire's back and placed a kiss on the top of her head. "Get inside; I'll grab your backpack."

Claire disentangled herself from Quil and opened the back door, stepping inside the house.

Once she was in, Quil closed his eyes and leaned against the back door, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. The situation he was in was getting harder to deal with by the day. He could already feel his resolve crumbling piece by piece every time Claire touched him. His mind was screaming at him that he needed to do the right thing….the smart thing. His heart was screaming that all he wanted was to make Claire happy. And his body, well his body was screaming at him that he needed to do something about this…and soon. With a sigh he pushed himself up and went to get Claire's bag from his car.

"Hey Quil," Sharon said when Quil let himself in the backdoor with Claire's backpack slung over his shoulder. "She went upstairs to change."

"Hey," Quil muttered.

Sharon turned from where she had been standing at the sink and gave Quil a look. "What's with that tone? The princess do something to piss you off?" She snickered.

"She brought up the dating," Quil grumbled.

Sharon raised her eyebrows. "Oh, that. Hmmm, I was hoping she forgot about that."

Quil nodded. "Me too."

Sharon eyed him. "Somehow I thought you might be a little more excited about the prospect than you are. What's up?"

Quil shrugged. "I dunno," he sighed and flopped down at the kitchen table, dropping Claire's bag on the floor. "I mean I want to, but at the same time I don't, you know?"

Sharon walked over and sat in the chair next to Quil. "You have reservations?"

Quil shook his head. "Yeah I mean, you know so we date, okay fine, but dating leads to serious dating which leads to serious relationship which you know….leads to all sorts of other….._stuff_."

Sharon rested her chin on her hand and gave Quil a hard look. "You're worried about other stuff?"

Quil shrugged again. "A little, I guess."

"Quil, if you don't think you can handle this then I'll just tell Claire that I changed my mind. She'll hate me and all will be right in the world again. She's been way too pleasant since I brought up the dating in the first place."

"It's not me I'm worried about," Quil said quietly.

Sharon frowned. "Did something else happen with you two?"

Quil quickly shook his head. "No, no nothing has happened, it's just... Well it's like you said that day you came over to my house. Girls her age, some of them equate love with being you know….physical. I mean you saw how she reacted after that whole fiasco. Do you think she'll be able to deal with two years of dates ending with a peck on the cheek? I don't think I would even be able to do that."

"Do you want to table this for a while?"

"I don't know, I mean she'll be so disappointed. I actually physically hurt inside when I think about the look on her face if I tell her I don't want to date her."

"Well, you're not telling her you're never going to date her, you're just putting it off." Sharon sighed. "Look, ultimately it's up to you. I told you I'd be okay with it and we both know Claire is okay with it. If you think you're not ready that's fine. But at the same time it behooves me to remind you that there is a young girl up there who is head over heels for you. That isn't going to change whether you start dating now or two years from now. And honestly the fact that you are so reluctant makes me think you'd be able to handle the dating better than you think. Have some faith in yourself kiddo, I do." Sharon reached over and patted Quil's hand.

Quil shook his head an incredulous look on his face. "You know I think this is the first time in history a mother has actually had to convince a guy to ask her teenage daughter out on a date."

Sharon threw her hands in the air. "I'm not trying to convince you of anything. If you don't want to do it, then don't do it. Just remember who we're talking about here. If you think she's hard to deal with now, imagine if you go up there and crush her heart. I guess what I'm saying is you don't have to live with her. I do. Think about me Quil," Sharon smiled.

Quil laughed. "So basically you want me to date her so she isn't unbearable to live with."

"Honey, I have to live with Grace. I don't know if my nerves can handle much more."

"Well, since this is really for you," Quil said, "I guess I'm going to go upstairs and ask your daughter to go on a date with me."

"Good luck," Sharon said giving him the thumbs up. "I hope she says yes."

Quil rolled his eyes. "I think we both know that won't be a problem."

"You never know. She is a teenager. She could be upstairs talking to some new guy on the phone as we speak."

Sharon laughed heartily when Quil's eyes widened. "I'm joking! Honey if you knew how much she talked about you when you weren't around, you'd be sick of yourself. I know I'm sick of hearing about you. Go on, get out of here. Go get yourself a date."

"Thanks Sharon," Quil stood up. "I promise I'll be nothing but a gentleman."

"Oh, I know you will. Otherwise they'll be finding pieces of you scattered all over the greater Clallam County area."

Quil smiled until he saw the look Sharon was giving him.

"Yes, ma'am," he muttered. Quil grabbed Claire's bag and hurried out of the kitchen.


	2. The Day That You Decide

**Okay so I know I said I wasn't going to beg for reviews...but I lied! So if you don't mind just drop a line saying what you think good or bad. **

**I don't own it blah, blah, blah.**

**Chapter Name is from the song "The Day That You Decide" by Drive By**

* * *

"Claire?" Quil knocked on Claire's door. "I have your bag."

"Yeah, come on in."

Quil opened the door and walked into Claire's room. Once inside, he stopped and did a double take. While Claire's room was never really 'clean' it was now resembling a third world war zone.

"Umm did a bomb go off in here?" He stared around the room in shock. There were piles of clothes strewn about everywhere, books stacked in piles at various spots on the floor and her vanity top was covered with makeup and hair products.

Claire turned and looked at Quil, her hands stuffed on her hips. "Well when do I have time to clean it, Quil? I mean I go to school, have Mason Dixon Line practice, cheerleading practice, football games and when I'm done with all that homework. Where in there did you hear 'time in my schedule to clean my room'?" She snapped.

Quil raised his hands in a surrender gesture. "Okay, okay, I was just saying," he muttered.

He dropped Claire's bag onto the floor and glanced around. With a sigh he walked over to her computer desk, pulled a stack of magazines off her computer chair, and flopped into it, the legs groaning in protest under his weight.

"Could you not throw yourself onto my furniture? I mean, I can't afford to replace my chair every six months."

Quil frowned. "Hey, you've only had to replace one chair."

Claire raised her eyebrows.

"Okay two," he relented. "You know what amazes me? How someone who is such an obvious….slob," Quil made a face, "can always look so good."

Claire smiled. "You think I look good?" She gave him a little twirl.

Quil nodded. "Yeah…..you always look good," he said quietly.

"Well aren't you just Mr. Sweetie." She suddenly narrowed her eyes. "What did you do?"

Quil gave her a shocked expression. "What do you mean? Can't I give you a compliment without getting the third degree?"

"Quil, no offense but every time you try to butter me up, it's because you're going to give me bad news. Remember when Binky died? You were being all sweet and then BAM! You tell me my cat got run over."

"That _was _a tragedy," Quil sighed.

Claire made a face. "You hated that cat. I'm still not entirely convinced _you_ didn't run him over."

"UH! I did not run that little beast over!"

"I'd find it more believable if you weren't smirking right now."

Quil quickly stopped grinning.

"So what's up? Lay it on me."

Quil cleared his throat. "Well Claire, here's the thing. I have thought very hard about this whole dating thing."

Claire's face fell and she dropped her eyes, looking down at her feet.

"And, I've weighed the pros and cons, taking into consideration all the factors-"

"Just spit it out Quil," Claire said softly.

"Okay. Here it goes." Quil took a deep breath. "Claire Ortecho, will you go on a date with me?"

Claire's head snapped up and she stared at Quil.

"Are you being serious?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

Quil nodded. "Yeah. I want to take you on a date."

"Oh my God, are you serious?"

Quil suddenly was having second thoughts. He thought this was what Claire wanted, but now he wasn't so sure. "Ummmm…….yes?" he answered, his response coming out as more of a confused question.

Claire squealed and clapped her hands. "This is the most exciting thing EVER!" She jumped up and down for a second then did a little dance.

Quil gave her a strange look. "If you keep acting like that, I'm going to rescind the offer."

Claire bounced over and dropped into Quil's lap on the chair. She threw her arms around his neck and said, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

"Claire, you're welcome, but you're also choking me."

"Oh sorry," Claire dropped her arms and hopped up. "Well when are we going? Where are we going? Oh my God what am I going to wear? Is this casual? Dressy? Oh my God I'll have to buy a new outfit."

Quil looked around. "First of all, chill out. Secondly, you mean to tell me in this whole mess," he waved his arm at the piles of clothes, "you can't find something to wear?"

"Quil, this is our first date. It has to be really special. Really special occasions call for new clothes. Don't you know anything?"

"Apparently not," he muttered.

"Okay, well in order to shop effectively I need to know what we're doing and where we're going."

Quil frowned. "Well, I haven't really thought about all that yet."

"Quil!" Claire shrieked. "How can you not know?"

Quil stood up. "Ummm, because I haven't been on a date in twelve years and only just decided to make this one about five minutes ago."

"Hmph. Okay, since you're a little rusty, I'll cut you some slack. But I want a full itinerary by tomorrow afternoon."

"Yes ma'am." He gave Claire a mock salute. "Will I be allowed to schedule bathroom breaks in that itinerary?"

"Don't be a smartass. I'm serious. This is a big deal." Claire dropped her eyes and twisted her fingers together. "It's my first date."

Quil took a deep breath. "You're right, I forgot. I'll have everything all planned by tomorrow. I promise. It will be the best first date you ever have."

"Umm, I'm actually hoping it's the only first date I ever have," Claire laughed nervously.

Quil closed his eyes. "God, I suck at this don't I?"

Claire nodded. "Well I do have to say I think you're lucky you imprinted. I mean if this is how you asked out all those other girls before me, I can't imagine you got that many dates."

"Hey, I did quite all right, thank you very much," he said, offended.

"I'm sure you did," Claire said quietly.

Quil shuffled his feet and sighed. "Okay, well…..I guess I should let you get started on your homework. I'll umm….I'll get you that schedule tomorrow."

Claire smiled. "I look forward to it."

"Okay, well….I'll see you later."

"See ya."

Quil stood there for another moment. "Okay, yeah." He turned, opened Claire's door and walked out, shutting the door behind him. He leaned against the closed door and let out a shuddering breath. "Well that was awkward," he muttered.

"Talking to yourself wolf man?"

Quil turned his head and saw Grace looking at him from her bedroom doorway, arms crossed in front of her chest.

"I guess," he said.

"You ask her out?"

Quil nodded.

Grace shook her head with a frown. "Unbelievable. I wasn't allowed to date until I turned sixteen. How is this even fair?"

Quil made a face. "Grace, you dated before you were sixteen," he said.

"I didn't say I _didn't _date. I said I wasn't _allowed_ to date. I don't know why Claire gets to, with a guy in his twenties no less."

"Technically, I'm sixteen," Quil said in his own defense.

"Yeah, okay," Grace snarked.

"Well as pleasant as our conversations always are, I have to go."

Quil walked past a glaring Grace, shouted a good bye to Sharon, and began to head home.

* * *

Halfway home the realization hit him. He was going on a date with Claire. The idea of it dropped so heavily on him, that he actually staggered for a moment. He thought he was going to pass out right there on the side of the road and was thankful he had decided to walk home, rather than take his car. He wondered if anyone else in the world had ever felt this simultaneously excited and scared shitless. On the one hand this was something Quil had been waiting for, for twelve years. On the other hand it was a year and a half too soon. He had lived his life to the mantra of _when Claire turns sixteen, when Claire turns sixteen, _but now….well now she was barely fifteen. No matter what Sharon said, no matter how he felt, no matter how Claire felt, deep down in his gut this still just felt…wrong. He knew he wanted this, but the fact that he _did _want it scared the hell out of him. More than anything else he wanted Claire to be happy. He knew he loved her more than anything on the face of the earth, but didn't that give him a moral responsibility to do right by her? He always felt he had, but now he wasn't so sure. Just because she thought she was ready, did that actually make her ready? The more he thought about it, the sicker he felt. Obviously he couldn't tell her he changed his mind. That would devastate her. But what about him? He wasn't sure he could handle the crush of emotions that were pressing in on his chest, making it hard for him to breathe. He needed to escape, needed to free himself from the guilt that sat like a cruel angel on his shoulder, whispering in his ear that he was being selfish. That he was kind of sick. That this whole thing was very, very wrong.

Quil bent over, hands on his knees and took a few gasping breaths. When he straightened up, he found his feet taking him in the opposite direction of home. He wasn't entirely surprised to find himself opening the door of Ruby's and taking a seat at the bar.

"Well if it isn't Mr. Ateara," Haley Trudoe said with a smile.

"Hey," Quil said. "Can I get a Bud?"

"Sure thing sweetie." Haley grabbed Quil's beer and set it on the bar. "So what has you dragging yourself inside on this beautiful day? I figured you'd be at the beach or on the cliffs or something."

"I've just got a lot on my mind. You know…..relationship stuff."

"Ahhh," Haley smiled. "Well, you want to talk about it?"

Quil shook his head. "Not really, I just wanna drink this beer and have a little non consequential conversation. Is that cool?"

Haley nodded. "No problem sugar. Sooo……let's talk all about me."

Quil laughed. "Sounds like a plan," he said.

* * *

Two hours later and a little tipsy, Quil left Ruby's feeling a bit better. He had managed to forget about his guilt for a little while at least. He didn't know why, but talking to Haley always made him feel better. He liked to think that if he hadn't imprinted he would have ended up with someone like her. Hell, with their history he probably _would_ have ended up with her. But now as he walked home, that good feeling began to fade. The guilt tried to worm it's way back in, but he pushed it aside. He decided right then and there that he was not going to feel bad about this. He had promised to take Claire on a date, and that was what he was going to do.


	3. House of Wolves

**I've actually been punching this out faster than I thought. So here's another new chapter for you. Hope you guys like it.**

**Chapter Title taken from the song "House of Wolves" by My Chemical Romance**

* * *

"You can't possibly say that Tracy Antares is hotter than Shannon Speith. I mean Shannon is _hot_."

"It's all relative to the size of the tits man, and you can't argue that Tracy's are bigger than Shannon's. I mean did you see her at the beach during the summer? She was totally busting out of her bikini."

Quil rolled his eyes. Seth and Embry had been arguing the same thing for nearly three months now. Who was hotter, whose boobs were bigger, who was easier. Quil for one could care less and was tired of listening to the argument. He tried to tune them out, but when he did, his thoughts drifted to his impending date with Claire, the whole thing of which made him very, very nervous. His stomach began to do a very complicated gymnastics routine and he had to take a few deeps breaths to keep from passing out.

_Just calm down, it's a date. That's all. A date. You've been on a ton of them. _Quil smiled when he felt his stomach settle down_. It's just a date with Claire_. His stomach jumped back up to salute the judge. With a groan Quil dropped his hamburger back onto his tray. There was no way he could eat now. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and glanced at his two still arguing pack mates.

"You can't say Tracy is hotter." Embry took a bite of his burger and chewed slowly, leveling a serious stare at Seth. "I won't let you."

Seth shrugged. "I'm just giving an opinion. What do you think Quil?"

Quil frowned. "I really don't give a damn whose hotter, I don't even really remember what either of them look like."

Seth and Embry exchanged a glance. "Imprints," they both muttered.

"Well I mean really, is this a discussion you need to be having in a McDonald's?" Quil chastised.

"What? Just because you don't notice chicks means we can't? You used to be fun! Now you're all moody and depressing. Seriously, it's a total buzz kill," Embry retorted.

Quil opened his mouth to respond, then noticing a group of older teens who had walked in through the doors, closed his mouth and grinned. "Speaking of buzz kills, check it out. Embry's girlfriend just walked in." Quil elbowed Embry in the side, his grin widening.

Embry glanced over his shoulder and groaned.

As all three looked across the restaurant, the girl Quil had mentioned noticed them. Her face broke into a huge smile and she waved enthusiastically.

"Oh God, we've been spotted." Embry hurriedly turned around and slumped down in the booth.

"She's coming over," Seth warned. "Be nice."

"Oh, okay mom." Embry glared at Seth.

"Hey guys!"

"Hey Shellie," Quil said, grinning at Embry.

"Hi Embry," Shellie said, her voice bubbling with excitement.

Embry suddenly became very interested in his fries.

"How are you?" Shellie pressed.

"Fine," Embry muttered after a warning look from Seth.

"So, that new action movie comes out this Friday."

"Yep."

"I know how much you like those kinds of movies, so I was thinking maybe we could go see it."

Embry raised his eyebrows. "Umm, no. I mean I've told you a hundred times that I have no interest in you and I don't want to hang out, and yet you keep thinking that I'm interested in you and I want to hang out."

Shellie smiled. "So I could pick you up. I have a new car, a Ford Taurus." She said this proudly.

Quil made an impressed face and nodded, looking at Embry. "You hear that Em? A Taurus."

Embry kicked Quil under the table and then looked up at Shellie.

"Look I've tried to be nice, but now I am going to recite a poem I wrote, just for you." Embry made a big production of clearing his throat. "I think you are ugly, you make me feel ill, please get away from me." He made a shooing motion with his hand.

Shellie's face fell. "Wow, that was really harsh," she whispered.

Embry shrugged.

Quil and Seth both gave her apologetic looks as she slowly walked away from their booth.

"Man, that was really cruel," Seth admonished.

"How do you consider that a poem? It didn't even rhyme." Quil said.

Embry gave Quil an exasperated look. "Dude, it's called Haiku. Didn't you learn anything in school?"

"Umm, no I was too busy being suspended and turning into a werewolf to pay attention the day they taught poetry."

"You know, you're really horrible," Seth piped up. "I mean Shellie's nice."

"Blech," Embry spat.

"So she's not the best looking girl in the world. So she has some complexion issues. So her hair's a little frizzy. So she doesn't have the best teeth. So what?"

"So what? Seth, the girl has a snaggletooth. So what. You believe this guy?" Embry jerked his thumb at Seth. "No wonder you think Tracy is hotter than Shannon. Dude Shellie's a total uggo. My dog wouldn't fuck her."

"You don't have a dog," Quil pointed out helpfully.

"I do have a dog…..inside of me." Embry pointed at himself. "And it won't fuck her."

"Number one it's a wolf, not a dog and number two…..you're an ass." Seth gave Embry a disgusted look.

"Why because I don't like the ugly chick? Why don't you go out with her if you love her so much."

"Because she doesn't like me."

"She probably could, let's find out," Embry smirked. "Hey Shel-"

Seth grabbed Embry's arm which had been up waving and hissed, "Shut up man!"

"See! Don't get all high and mighty with me. You wouldn't fuck her either." Embry sat back, a satisfied look on his face.

"You know what, I hope you imprint. Yeah I hope you imprint on the biggest, fattest, ugliest girl in the world. With missing teeth. And bald. And young so you're stuck with her for a long time. I hope that happens, because I will laugh my ass off!" Seth snapped.

"I'm rubber you're glue," Embry said with a smile.

"Grow up," Quil chastised.

"Me grow up? Ummm pot meet kettle. You've been sitting here bitching about your fourteen-year-old girlfriend. I feel like I'm back in high school."

"Hey, first of all she's not my girlfriend…..officially. And secondly I wasn't bitching I was merely explaining my hesitation about this whole date thing until I was so rudely interrupted by the whole big tit debate," Quil complained.

"Oh boo hoo cry me a river," Embry replied.

"Just because you have no compassion…."

"MOTHBALLS!"

Quil and Embry both turned and stared at Seth.

"Dude, you have Tourette's or something?" Embry asked.

Seth didn't respond, just sat, jaw slack, eyes glazed.

Quil and Embry followed Seth's gaze which was locked on a very attractive middle-aged woman who had just walked in.

"Ohhh, I see. Checking out the milf huh?"

"Wow, that saying went out like two decades ago," Quil informed Embry.

"Who cares she's definitely a mom I would like to fu- OW!"

Embry rubbed his arm where Seth had punched him. "Dude, what's your damage?"

Seth didn't respond. He slowly stood up and walked over to the woman.

"Holy shit," Quil whispered. "I think our little boy just imprinted. How's that for irony," he said with an amused tone.

"What, on the milf?" Embry asked, rubbing his arm.

"Man, some tact, please." Quil punched Embry on his other arm.

"That's it, I'm not hanging out with you guys anymore," Embry stood with his tray and walked away from the booth.

* * *

"She's originally from Miami." Seth's voice had a dreamlike tone as he spoke.

"And she's married," Quil retorted.

"She has three kids, the youngest is a Junior at Washington State," Seth continued, ignoring Quil.

"And she has a husband," Embry said.

"Hey does she have a daughter? Maybe you could date her." Quil snickered.

"She works as a deputy clerk for Judge Laferty in Port Angeles."

"Hey awesome, if Quil gets arrested for statutory rape, maybe she can pull some strings."

Quil punched Embry hard on the arm. "Screw you man! That's not even remotely funny," he growled.

"Lighten up will you, you know I'm joking," Embry snapped.

"She's lived here almost a year now."

"Seth man….she's married. And forty eight, which I can't believe she told you by the way. Are you sure that you imprinted on this woman?"

"Positive. The whole world was swimming, I felt like I was floating, all I could see was her."

"It's just, I don't know it's just weird. I mean I've never heard of anything like this before." Quil scratched his head.

"You imprinted on a two-year-old. How is it any different?"

"Well for one thing Claire wasn't oh I don't know….MARRIED already." Quil retorted.

"You know what I find amusing about this whole situation? Just a few hours ago you talked about me imprinting on some fat ugly chick and then BAM! You imprint on an old married lady." Embry snorted laughter.

"She's not old!" Seth snapped.

"She's like twenty three years older than you!"

"So….Quil's girlfriend is fourteen!"

"Why do you guys always have to exploit my pain to make a point?" Quil grumbled. "All right. You know what? We need to go talk to Sam about this."

"Yeah, good idea, maybe Emily's cooking," Embry said.

Quil gave Embry a disgusted look. "We just ate!"

Embry shrugged. "So?"

Quil shook his head. "Okay, let's go. Seth?" He turned to see Seth still sitting on the couch, his eyes unfocused a smile plastered on his face. Quil rolled his eyes and grabbed Seth's collar pulling him up. "Come on, lover boy." He marched Seth out of the house in front of him.

* * *

"QUIL! EMBRY! SO HELP ME IF YOU BREAK ONE PIECE OF FURNITURE IN THERE YOU ARE PAYING FOR IT!"

Panting, Quil and Embry broke up their wrestling match and gave Emily guilty looks.

"Sorry Emily," they both muttered.

Embry flopped down on the sofa and grabbed a magazine off the coffee table, immediately becoming absorbed in the latest celebrity gossip.

Quil fixed his shirt and joined Emily in the kitchen, sitting at the table as she bustled around mixing things in one bowl, stirring heavenly smelling things in saucepans on the stove and generally doing ten things at once. Quil watched her with an amused stare and popped a pretzel into his mouth.

"So," Emily wiped her hands on a dish towel and turned to look at Quil. "How are things with you and Claire?"

Quil frowned. "Must we talk about this?" he sighed.

Emily gave him a look and said, "You may not want to talk about it, but just a warning….my sister stopped by this morning."

Quil swallowed hard. "Sharon was here?"

Emily nodded. "Yep, she told me and Sam all about what the girls were up to these days, how they were doing in school…..who they were dating." She eyed Quil meaningfully.

Quil winced. "She told you that, huh? Well I was hoping that was something that would stay secret a little while longer." Quil grabbed another pretzel and began to break it into tiny pieces. "So uh, what did Sam say about it?"

Emily sighed. "Well he's not happy Quil, and frankly neither am I."

Quil frowned. "Why not? We aren't doing anything you know, _bad_."

Emily raised her eyebrows.

"Well nothing _too_ bad. It's just a date," Quil muttered.

"Quil, I know you love her but she's young. You have to be careful."

"I know! God, why does everyone keep telling me _I'm_ the one who has to be careful? She's the one who always…" Quil trailed off.

"She's a bit of an eager beaver, huh?"

Quil got a horrified look on his face. "You did not just say that. UGH!"

"What?" Emily suddenly clapped her hand over her mouth. "Oh my God , that was so NOT what I meant!"

"Well, I mean, geez Emily. Show some restraint on the dirty talk."

Emily smacked Quil on the head with her dishtowel. "You know what I was trying to say."

Quil nodded. "I know, I'm…..dealing with it." He took a deep breath. "So it's weird, this Seth thing, huh?"

Emily shrugged. "What can you do, you can't pick who you imprint on. Old, young, married….what's meant to be will be."

"Yeah I guess."

The door suddenly opened and Sam walked in, Seth trailing behind him.

"Everything okay?" Emily asked Sam.

Sam nodded and placed a kiss on Emily's head. "Yeah, Seth is going to tell Julie everything. Apparently her marriage is rocky at best. She told Seth she's living alone right now." Sam suddenly turned and gave Quil a narrow eyed look. "Now I want to talk to Quil."

Quil looked up. "I didn't do it!" He blurted out the impulse response he had been using since he was five.

"Yes he did, I saw him," Embry, who had ambled into the kitchen to join them, piped up.

"Dude, what the hell!?" Quil yelled.

"What? I don't even know what we're talking about," Embry said. "I just enjoy jerking your chain."

Sam frowned. "Embry shut up. Quil, backyard. Now."

Quil slowly stood up, threw Embry a dirty look, and followed Sam outside.

In the backyard Sam and Quil stood facing each other for a moment until Quil dropped his eyes and began making small patterns in the grass with the toe of his sneaker.

"Well?" Sam said.

"Well what?" Quil shot back.

"Hey, no lip. You know what I'm talking about. Sharon was over this morning."

"Sharon said I could!" Quil said louder than he intended. His nerves were all on edge, making him feel as though he might literally explode at any moment.

"I know, she told us. You know I don't approve."

Quil nodded. "I know."

"But you're going to date her anyway?"

Quil glanced up and narrowed his eyes. "Are you forbidding me to date her?"

Sam sighed. "No Quil, I'm not forbidding you. If Sharon says it's okay, then ultimately it's her decision. Claire is her daughter. But, and I say this in all seriousness. If you step one toe out of line, I will know about it. And then you _will_ have a problem. Understand?"

Quil nodded.

"Use your words. _Do you understand_?"

"Yes, I understand," Quil spat.

"Fine. Get your ass back in the house." Sam turned and stalked back through the door.

Quil stood in the yard for a moment. He dropped his head back on his neck and closed his eyes. He wanted to yell at the top of his lungs, but didn't want to alarm the neighbors so he settled for letting an annoyed growl rattle around in his chest for a moment. He then took a deep breath, opened his eyes and went back into the house.


	4. Saturday Night

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed!**

**Chapter Title taken from the song "Saturday Night" by Eve 6**

* * *

Saturday night rolled around much faster than Quil was prepared for. It was officially the night of his and Claire's first date. Quil didn't think he had ever been more nervous in his entire life, and that was saying something considering he had fought against vampires. Vampires suddenly seemed like child's play compared to this.

As he stood in the bathroom, looking at his reflection in the full length mirror hanging on the back of the door, he couldn't help but give himself a disgusted look. _Nothing's going to happen it's just a date_ he told himself. He adjusted the collar of his dress shirt and scrutinized himself. Dress shirt, slacks. Not to dressy, but not his usual baggy jeans and tee shirt combo. He turned his head right and left, cracking his neck then shook out his arms. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes. _She will behave herself. Nothing will happen. We're going to be chaperoned._ He opened his eyes and tried to smile. It came out as a half grimace, half maniacal grin. _Okay no smiling._

"Hey Romeo! Open up!" Embry pounded on the bathroom door. "There are other people that live in this house that need to use the bathroom."

Quil rolled his eyes and opened the door.

Embry raised his eyebrows. "Hmmm."

Quil looked down at himself. "What?" When Embry didn't respond he started to panic. "What, what?"

"Wow, calm down Sally. I was going to say you don't look half bad. Hell I'd even consider going out with you."

Quil made a face. "Could you not? Please not tonight, okay?"

Embry's eyes widened. "You are really nervous, aren't you?"

"Well, yeah, I mean, this is my first date in twelve years. And it's with Claire, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah I know. You imprints are all so pussy whipped. I mean have you even seen Seth's face since he met Julie? I know I haven't and we were right in the middle of a General Hospital marathon."

"Well, I'm sorry your soap opera boyfriend is busy getting laid." Quil gave Embry a mock look of pity.

"Hey, General Hospital is a good show. Why the hell do you think it's been on so long?"

"Whatever." Quil took a deep breath. "Well, here goes nothing." He walked past Embry into the hall.

"Hey Quil?"

"Yeah?"

"Good luck tonight man. I mean that."

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

Embry nodded. "No problem. Now get the hell out of here, I have the bathroom to myself all night, and I'm not letting it go to waste." He held up a stack of magazines.

Quil laughed. "Knock yourself out."

* * *

Ten minutes later Quil was nearly to Claire's house. As he approached her street he had a crazy idea that he should just keep driving. Just drive right by Claire's house and get the hell out of Washington. He could go anywhere. Pushing the ridiculous idea aside, he turned into Claire's driveway. He shut off the engine and sat for a moment, his heart pounding as though it was trying to escape his chest. _You're fine, this is no big deal. Don't sweat it._ Quil opened his door, extricated himself from the car and walked slowly up to the back porch. One last thought of fleeing crossed his mind before he hesitantly knocked on the door. It felt weird knocking. He hadn't knocked at the Ortecho home in years. He stood nervously shuffling his feet until the door opened.

"Well don't you look nice," Sharon greeted him.

"Oh thanks," Quil said, his voice coming out in a croak.

"Don't worry, I think she's probably more nervous than you are," Sharon said with a smile.

"I don't actually know if that's possible." Quil replied.

"Hey."

Claire's voice was so low, Quil could barely hear her.

"Wow, you umm you look…wow," he breathed.

Claire was wearing a simple black dress with thin spaghetti straps that clung to all the right places. She carried a thin red cardigan over her arm and wore a pair of black ballet flats. Her dark brown hair was down in loose waves. She wore very little make up other than her eyes which stood out with the black liner and mascara she had applied.

"You look really nice too. I think this is the first time I've seen you dressed up since my middle school graduation."

"Are you going to be warm enough? It's cool out."

"I've got my sweater, plus if I get too cold I'll just snuggle up against you."

"Ahem," Sharon cleared her throat at that comment.

"Mom, he's a natural heater. If I get cold it will just be convenient." Claire informed her mother in a practical voice.

"Uh huh," Sharon rolled her eyes.

"Well, I guess we should get going," Quil said.

"Yes, I guess we should," Sharon said grabbing her coat.

As Quil followed Claire to his car and opened the passenger side door for her, he suddenly realized just how weird this was going to be. He was going on a date with his imprint…..and her mother.

* * *

"This totally sucks." Claire flopped back in their booth and pouted.

"What? You're the one who wanted to do the supervised dating," Quil reminded her.

"Yeah but when she said 'supervised' I didn't think she really meant '_supervised_'."

Quil and Claire both looked at a booth across the way and two down from theirs.

Sharon, reading a book, noticed their looks and glanced up. She smiled and gave them both a finger wave.

Claire sighed. "I can't believe she doesn't trust us."

Quil raised his eyebrows. "I can."

"Whatever, you know this is discrimination. Grace doesn't have to have supervised dates."

"Grace's boyfriends aren't fourteen years older than her."

"How does mom know that? She doesn't go on Grace's dates!"

"Look," Quil leaned forward, elbows resting on the table. "You got what you wanted. We're allowed to go on dates." He reached forward and tucked a strand of Claire's dark hair behind her ear. "I mean you had fun for the most part, right?"

Quil had taken Claire to the Port Angeles Symphony. For all her teenage tendencies, Claire had a surprising love of classical music. She had never been to the symphony before and Quil was glad he had been able to share it with her. After the symphony they had taken a short walk before heading back towards La Push. On the way Claire got hungry so they had stopped at a small local diner.

"Yeah, I mean the symphony was amazing, but…" She sighed.

"Come on Claire bear this is our first date. Don't ruin it by pouting."

"I'm not pouting," Claire pouted.

Quil laughed. "Then what's with the sour puss?"

"I just want to spend time with you. Alone."

Quil sighed "Let's just be happy with what we have. Sharon is really being cool about this whole thing. Cut her some slack."

"I know, but if we were alone, I could do this."

For a moment Quil was confused. Claire just sat across from him, smiling. He was about to ask her what she meant, when he suddenly hissed in a breath. Claire had slipped her foot out of her shoe and was rubbing his thigh. She slid down a little further in the booth and rested her foot on the growing bulge in his pants.

Quil took a deep breath and said, "What are you doing?"

"Just having a little fun," Claire giggled.

Quil glanced down at his lap and then gave her an incredulous look. "You know what amazes me?" He asked.

"No what?" Claire whispered.

"That you do the things you do, no let me rephrase, that you _KNOW_ how to do the things you do. I mean we haven't even kissed yet. Should I be worried about where in the hell you learned this stuff? It's that god damn Mindy Klein isn't it? I always knew she was a bad influence," Quil grumped.

"No, I get it from magazines and movies," Claire said. Seeing Quil's pointed look she relented. "And Mindy."

"I thought so."

"Well I can't wait for you to make the first move or I'll be waiting until I'm sixteen. Besides I have to tell my friends something besides 'Quil's a total prude who won't touch me'."

"First of all that's _twice_ now that you've called me a prude, which I'm not, and secondly why in the hell would you tell your friends about anything that happens between you and me?"

"Umm, because I'm a teenage girl and that's what we do. I have about fifteen texts on my phone already asking me what's going on. We talk about everything Quil. Besides even if I didn't already know that you tell Seth and Embry everything that goes on between us, the whole pack is going to know anyway, so how is that any different?"

Quil frowned and pushed Claire's foot out of his lap. "I don't intentionally tell the whole pack stuff. You don't understand that when we're together, even though we're individual beings, our minds are all linked. I know everything that they do, way more than I want to know and vice versa. It's not something I choose, it just is."

"So it's the same thing!" Claire stated.

"No it's not!" Quil snapped. "You can choose to not blab your mouth to your teenage friends who might tell their parent's about their friend Claire's pervy older boyfriend. Seth and Embry and even the whole pack know that our situation is unique. The rest of the world doesn't!"

"Why are you getting so mad about this?"

"Because Claire! Just because Sharon is okay with this little arrangement, that doesn't mean everyone else will be. I could get in trouble. Serious trouble. Jail time trouble. And it's like you don't even care about that. It doesn't even register in your head. It's just all about Claire getting what she wants."

"Is that what you think? You think this is about me being selfish?" Claire's cheeks flushed red with anger. "I can't believe you think so little of me."

"Well what else am I supposed to think? You keep pushing and pushing when I ask you to back off. If it isn't about you getting what you want then what is it about?"

"It's about me being in love with you!" Claire snapped. "It's about me not being able to concentrate in school because all I do is think about you! It's about me laying awake for hours at night, just waiting until the morning when I get to see you! It's about me feeling hollow and alone when I'm not with you! I mean…" Claire let out a choked sob. "Don't you feel the same?"

Quil sighed. "Oh, Claire bear. I do feel the same. You are all I ever think about. You know I love you. But God Claire, I can't keep going around in circles with you. Just because we feel that way doesn't make it right. And it doesn't make it legal either."

"Oh you with all the legal crap. Don't you think almost everyone on the reservation knows that you guys aren't normal? Do you think it's escaped their attention that not one of you has aged in twelve years? Don't you think they notice that Jake used to have a toddler hanging around who's now a grown woman and married to him? They notice that things are different for you guys. No one is going to care if they see you holding my hand on the street!"

"It's not just them Claire! It's me too! I look at you and I know that it's wrong for me to want you but I do! I want you so badly it hurts. But then deep inside I feel sick and disgusted with myself because I shouldn't want you like this." Quil sighed and hung his head. "Claire, I get angry with you about the physical stuff because….when it comes to you…….I can't trust myself to stop."

"I don't want you to stop! Can't you see that?" Claire reached forward and took Quil's hand in hers. She turned it over and lightly kissed his palm. "I don't want you to stop," she repeated. "We can just kiss and stuff, okay? Is that okay?" She kissed his palm again.

Quil closed his eyes and nodded yes, absorbed in the feeling of her lips on his palm.

"You kids okay over here?"

Quil's eyes snapped open and on reflex he jerked his hand away from Claire. Sharon was standing next to their booth, hands planted on her hips.

"We're fine mom," Claire sighed.

"Well it was starting to look pretty intense from where I was sitting."

"No, no it wasn't," Quil cleared his throat. "We were just talking."

"Hmm. Well it's getting late. Time to wrap it up soon, okay?"

Quil nodded. "Sure thing, Sharon."

They both watched Sharon retreat back to her booth. When she was out of earshot, Quil leaned back and groaned.

"If she's going to be our supervisor, I really don't think stopping is going to be a problem," Claire grumbled.

Quil gave her a weak smile. He leaned closer to her across the table and whispered, "I'm sorry we fought on our first date."

"It's okay," Claire whispered back. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"Time's up!" Sharon walked back over to their booth.

"God, mom! Is this really necessary?" Claire scowled at Sharon.

"Oh come on, I'm letting him drive you home aren't I?"

"Big whoop," Claire muttered.

"Hey young lady, I can just as easily take you home myself right now."

"No, no it's fine. We're going to go now. Come on Claire." Quil stood and held his hand out to Claire. He helped her out of the booth, and clasped his fingers with hers.

Claire smiled up at him and, hands joined, they followed Sharon out of the restaurant.

* * *

Quil's car pulled into the Ortecho's driveway behind Sharon's car. He watched as Sharon parked and jumped out of her Jetta. She ran over to Quil's window and knocked. Quil rolled his window down and Sharon stuck her head in the car.

"Two minutes. That's all. Two minutes and then I send Mr. Ortecho out here."

Quil's eyes widened. "That will absolutely not be necessary," he assured Sharon.

Sharon nodded. "Two minutes."

Quil rolled his window up and watched until Sharon was in the house. Once the back door was closed he turned to Claire.

"So, our first date. What'd you think?"

Claire smiled. "Well other than my mother watching us like a hawk and us having a fairly ugly fight, I'd say it was okay."

Quil grinned. He reached over and took Claire's hand, lacing his fingers with hers. "I'm sorry it kind of sucked."

Claire looked down at their joined hands and whispered, "Quil, remember in the restaurant when you said we could kiss and stuff?"

"Yeah."

"Well…..are you going to kiss me?"

"Do you want me to?"

"You know I do. But Quil?"

"Yeah?"

Claire looked up at Quil and he was surprised to see tears gleaming in her eyes. "It's just, you know…..I know I've been acting like I know what I'm doing, but I've never kissed anyone before, and I don't want you to hate it."

Quil reached over with his free hand and put his fingers under Claire's chin. "Claire, I've been waiting twelve years to kiss you for the first time. You could slobber all over my face and I'd love it."

"Oh my God, you think I'm going to slobber?" Claire moaned and dropped her head back against her head rest.

Quil laughed.

"Don't laugh at me, this is serious! I mean what if kissing me is horrible? What if I totally screw it up? I mean-"

Claire's lament was broken off when Quil pressed his lips lightly against hers. "See," he whispered. "That wasn't horrible, was it?"

Claire just shook her head. Quil leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers again, this time lingering there a moment before pulling back. He could see Claire's chest rising and falling, her eyes still closed. Unable to resist, he leaned forward again, this time his mouth a little more insistent, his tongue lightly tracing her lower lip. Claire opened her mouth and suddenly her tongue was touching his. Quil growled deep in his chest and deepened the kiss, his hands fisting in Claire's silky hair. He moved his lips from Claire's mouth to her jaw, kissing his way along her jaw line to her neck. Claire clung to Quil's shoulders, small contented sighs escaping her lips. Suddenly a light on the back porch of the house flashed. Quil and Claire broke apart, both panting slightly. Quil looked at the house and saw Sharon at the back door flashing the porch light.

"Wow," Claire whispered.

"Yeah, that was one of my better kisses," Quil bragged.

"It can _get_ better than that?" Claire asked, her voice awed.

Quil just nodded.

"Wow," she whispered again.

On the back porch Sharon flashed the light more insistently.

"I'd better get you inside."

"Quil, even with everything, I had a really nice time tonight."

Quil smiled. "Me too Claire bear." He gave her one more soft kiss, then opened his door. He walked around to the passenger side and opened Claire's door, taking her hand to help her out of the car. They walked hand in hand to the back porch. Sharon opened the door for Claire and raised her eyebrows at Quil.

"I trust you had a good time tonight, Claire," she said with a smirk as she took in the dazed look on her daughters face.

"Yeah I did," Claire replied.

"Say good night to Quil," Sharon said.

"Sweet dreams Claire." Quil smiled.

"You too, good night," Claire said dreamily as she floated into the house and disappeared into the kitchen.

Sharon turned and gave Quil a look. "Wipe that smug look off your face. It can't have been that good. It was her first kiss. She has no comparison."

Quil laughed. "You always know the right words to make a guy feel really secure, Sharon."

"It's what I'm best at," She smiled.

"Thanks for letting us go out tonight. She might not appreciate it now, but I'm sure Claire's thanking you too."

Sharon rolled her eyes. "I'll bet. And you're welcome by the way. Now get the hell out of here."

Quil laughed again. "Good night Sharon."

"Good night Quil."

Quil stepped off the porch and found himself walking back to his car with a little spring in his step. He got to his car and opened the door then froze. He suddenly realized what he had just agreed to in the restaurant, and it dawned on him that it was not a good idea. Not a good idea at all.


	5. All Mixed Up

**Chapter Title taken from the song "All Mixed Up' by 311**

* * *

Sunday morning Quil lay in bed his mind racing. He had been restless all night, tossing and turning, replaying everything from the night before. He had finally given up on trying to fall asleep and instead studied the cracks and watermarks on the ceiling while trying to come up with the best way to tell Claire that he didn't think any of this was a good idea. At 3:00 AM he decided he was just going to tell her he wasn't comfortable with the situation. At 3:26 AM he decided to not say anything, he knew deep down he wanted this as much as she did. At 3:47 AM he changed his mind again. And again at 4:12. Now as he looked at the clock which read 6:45 he was still undecided. With a groan he rolled out of bed and padded out of his room. He could hear the shower running and Seth singing at the top of his lungs.

As he approached the kitchen he heard the radio on and smelled food cooking. He frowned. No one cooked in their house. Their garbage can was overflowing with pizza boxes and fast food wrappers. He stepped into the kitchen and stopped. Julie, Seth's imprint was standing over the stove, spatula in one hand, cigarette in the other. She was wearing one of Seth's old tee shirts and a pair of his boxers. Quil watched in amusement as she bopped from side to side, using the spatula as a microphone as she sang along to the radio.

"Morning," he said.

Julie shrieked and dropped the spatula. She spun around a hand clutched over her heart.

The shower turned off and Seth's concerned voice called, "Julie?"

"I'm fine!" She shouted. She then leveled a glare at Quil. "You scared the shit out of me! I don't have super sensitive hearing or whatever."

Quil laughed. "Sorry. You kind of surprised me too. We generally don't use the kitchen as a……kitchen."

"Well that is painfully obvious. Do you know how long I had to look to find a skillet?"

Quil gave her a confused look. "We have a skillet?"

Julie jerked her thumb at the stove. "Apparently."

Quil gave an appreciative look. "Who knew." He dropped into a chair at the kitchen table and sighed.

"Well, you want something to eat? I managed to find eggs."

Quil made a face. "Blech." He had never liked eggs.

Julie ran her cigarette under the kitchen faucet and tossed it into the trash. "Well there isn't much else. Your fridge is sadly lacking in options."

Seth walked into the kitchen, rubbing his wet hair with a towel. "Well it was _someone's_," Seth pointedly looked at Quil, "turn to shop this week." He leaned over and gave Julie a kiss. "Good morning," he said huskily into her ear.

"Isn't it a little early to be all disgusting with each other?" Quil grumbled.

"Isn't it a little early to be a prick?" Seth shot back. "You pretty pissy this morning. Date not go well? Who was it with again? Claire? Or was it Sharon?"

"Joke all you want, it just rolls off my back," Quil said. "And for your information the date was…..weird. I mean it was good, but with Sharon there... and then Claire and I had a fight…."

Seth frowned. "You guys had a fight on your first date?"

Quil shrugged. "Yeah sort of. I mean we made up but, it's just been weighing…..you know?"

Seth nodded. "I get it."

Julie walked over and placed a plate in front of Seth. He smiled up at her. "Thanks, you're the best."

Julie gave him a little curtsey and then looked at Quil. "Sure you don't want anything? I could make you toast. I just have to scrape the mold off the bread."

Seth tried to say something, but his mouth was full of egg so he settled for pointing his fork at Quil. "Shopping," he choked out finally.

Quil dropped his head back on his neck. "I don't _want_ to go shopping," he whined.

"Too bad. I went last week. Embry went two weeks ago. It's your turn. It's on the chart." Seth pointed to a color coded chart that was stuck on the front of the fridge.

Quil gave Seth a dirty look. "If I would have known what a control freak you were, I never would have let you move in."

"No take backs," Seth retorted. He shoveled the rest of his eggs in his mouth and swallowed. "Okay I'm going to get dressed." He stood up, gave Julie another kiss and bounced out of the kitchen.

Julie watched him go, a smile on her face. She shook her head and picked up Seth's plate, putting it in the sink.

Quil watched her for a moment, then took a deep breath. "Julie?"

Julie turned from where she was cleaning off the stove. "Yeah?"

Quil shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "Can I ask you something personal? I mean you don't have to answer, you can tell me to go to hell, but…." he trailed off.

Julie scrutinized Quil for a moment, then walked over and sat at the table. She grabbed her cigarettes and lit one. "Ask away," she said finally.

"Well I was just wondering, I mean I was just curious about whether well….what I mean is…"

"Hun, I don't have all day. What's on your mind?"

"Okay. I was just wondering if it bothers you. The age difference between you and Seth."

Julie took a drag on her cigarette. "I'm still getting used to it," she admitted, exhaling. "The thing is, the first time I talked to him, you know that day in McDonald's…"

Quil nodded.

"Well I felt something. Right away. And it's not just because he's a total fox….though that helps," Julie smiled. "But it was the way he looked at me, the things he said. He made me feel so good, so special, that I didn't even register how young he was. I just saw him. And I could see the way that he saw me. In his eyes, I wasn't this old married woman who has three kids and a crummy job. I was beautiful. And that feeling Quil, that matters more than our ages."

Quil sighed. "So you don't care what people think when they see you together?"

Julie shook her head. "Nope, I've been around long enough to know that the only person whose opinion matters is your own. If we all lived in fear of what other people thought about us, the world would be full of shut ins."

"What if you could get arrested? Would that change your opinion?"

Julie shrugged. "Maybe. Is that what you're worried about? That you're going to get arrested?"

"Well it's not just that. I mean, I just feel…."

"Guilty?"

"Yeah I mean Claire is fourteen. I feel like a pervert." Quil rubbed his eyes.

"You know a week ago I would have thought the same thing. But this imprinting thing….it kind of changes the rules. I mean when Seth explained it all to me I was a little freaked out." Julie gave Quil a meaningful look. "I know I don't know you that well Quil, but Seth told me about your situation. You aren't a pervert for having feelings for a young woman that you plan on spending the rest of your life with. Especially if she feels the same. You aren't forcing her. You love her. That's something you should never feel guilty about." She put out her cigarette and smiled.

Seth stepped into the kitchen from the hallway where he had been waiting for Quil and Julie to finish talking. He pulled Julie up and kissed her, then folded her into a hug. "I can't ever express how lucky I am to have found you."

Julie smiled up at him. "That's true. You are lucky. Okay let me go, I need to get dressed."

Julie wrenched her self from Seth's grasp and headed down the hallway.

Seth sat at the table with Quil. He grabbed Julie's cigarettes and crushed the pack. "I've told her that I can't have her die from cancer but she keeps smoking anyway. She says she doesn't know me well enough to stop just because I ask her too." He made a face. "Which I find interesting considering she's sleeping with me."

Quil stood up and clapped Seth on the shoulder. "Keep trying man. What else can you do?"

Quil wandered back down the hallway to his bedroom and flopped onto his bed. His conversation with Julie made him feel a little better, but he still couldn't get rid of the feeling that he was going to be heading into dangerous territory.

* * *

Monday afternoon found Quil in the parking lot of Forks High, waiting for Claire. He was leaning against the hood of his car, enjoying another clear day. They happened so rarely that he couldn't stand being cooped up, even in a car. From in the school he heard the final bell ring. He hoped Claire didn't dawdle. He had sworn to Seth and Embry that he would go shopping today. Their food situation was reaching critical mass. Fifteen minutes later there was still no sign of Claire. He knew she didn't have any sort of practice today so he didn't know what was taking so long. He pulled his cell phone out and dialed her number. It went straight to voice mail. With a sigh he tossed the phone into the cars open window and went back to leaning on the hood.

When he was about to give up and go inside to look for her, he saw Claire walking out of the school with a friend. Claire spotted him and waved. He waved back and pointed at his watch. Claire rolled her eyes and whispered something to her girlfriend that Quil couldn't quite make out. _I have to stop listening to my headphones so loud_, he chastised himself.

Claire and her friend made their way to Quil's car. When they arrived, Claire dropped her bag, jumped into Quil's arms and attacked his lips.

"Hey, hey," Quil sputtered when she pulled away. "Can't we at least exchange pleasantries first?"

"How are you, blah, blah," Claire replied kissing him again.

"Hey come on." He detached Claire from his body and set her on her feet.

Claire made a face. "What?"

"Nothing, I just…"

"He's ashamed because there are a bunch of people in the parking lot looking at him like he's a perv," Claire's friend piped up.

Quil gave her a dirty look. "Mindy. A pleasure as always."

Mindy gave Quil a haughty look. "Claire, call me." She turned and flounced away with all the flair of a teenage drama queen.

"I don't like that girl," Quil grumbled.

"Is it true? What she said? Are you ashamed to kiss me? Because I thought we talked about this the other night?" Claire said quietly.

Seeing her devastated look, Quil sighed. "No I'm not ashamed. I'm just not a big fan of PDA."

Claire looked up at him. "Are you sure that's all?"

"Yeah," Quil swallowed hard. "That's all."

* * *

"Let's stop for ice cream."

Quil looked over at Claire. "We can't stop for ice cream, I have a trunk full of groceries."

"Quil you have Easy Mac and beer. I think it'll keep."

"Fine, but if I catch hell because the beer was not in the fridge at 6 sharp, I'm blaming you."

"Whatever. Take me to Scooter's."

Quil relented knowing Claire would pout until she got her way. He pulled into the parking lot of Scooter's and cut off his engine. He grabbed a few bucks from his change holder and handed it to Claire. "Hurry up. Get your ice cream and let's go."

"Quil," Claire whined. "I want to sit outside and eat it."

Quil sighed. "Fine, fine. You are really high maintenance today you know that?"

Claire smiled. "It's why you love me."

After they ordered - Quil got a soda, Claire a mint chocolate chip cone - they sat on one of the benches outside the small ice cream stand.

"Want to hear something funny?"

Quil took a sip of his soda and shrugged. "Sure why not."

"Today, when I told Mindy about my date, she asked why I would date a guy that looks like you."

Quil looked down at himself. He made a face and said, "That Mindy is a bitch, I look damn good."

Claire laughed. "Yes you do look good. But that's not what she meant. She meant why am I dating an Indian guy that still lives on the reservation."

Quil frowned. "First of all, I prefer the term Native American…"

Claire rolled her eyes.

"Secondly…….YOU'RE NATIVE AMERICAN. And _you_ live on the reservation."

"That's what I said! She said she didn't mean anything bad by it, but just thinks I should set my standards higher."

"Tell Mindy to go to hell. How can you get better than a werewolf?"

"She suggested a guy with a job."

"I have a job," Quil defended himself.

"Quil three mornings a week at the machine shop hardly constitutes a job."

"Well, you know I have the pack stuff. That's more important than any stupid "real" job."

"Well I mean, we have to think about our future. How are you going to support a family when we get married making three hundred bucks a week?"

Quil choked on his soda. "Married? Claire you're a freshman. We've been on one date," he sputtered.

"You haven't thought about getting married have you?" Claire gave Quil an accusing look.

"Well to be fair Claire I'm still wrapping my head around the idea that you're going to be getting your license in a year."

"Quil, you have to start thinking about these things."

Quil looked down and studied his feet. "You're ice cream's melting," he muttered.

He heard Claire sigh and his heart constricted. The fact was he had thought about their future together. He thought about it all the time, but hell she was still in high school. He knew he was going to marry Claire, there was no question in his mind about that, but did they have to talk about it now? He looked back up and started to explain this to her, but the sight before him caused all words to get caught in his throat.

Claire was leaning back against the picnic table, her eyes closed, her tongue swirling around the top of her ice cream cone.

Quil licked his lips and tried to look away. He should not be turned on by her eating ice cream. He had been taking her for ice cream since she was three. But as he watched her pink tongue dart out, licking her cone, a small spot of ice cream on her upper lip, he had to try very hard to suppress a lustful moan.

Claire opened her eyes and looked over at Quil. "What?" She asked.

"Noth-" Quil cleared his throat. "Nothing."

"What do I have ice cream on my face or something?"

"Actually, you have a umm a bit right there," Quil whispered and leaned forward, pressing his lips against hers.

Quil pulled Claire closer and she dropped her cone to the ground, wrapping her arms around his neck. Her mouth was cool from the ice cream and she tasted like mint. Quil moaned softly into her mouth.

"There are children present here," An angry voice snapped.

Quil and Claire broke apart. "Sorry, sorry," Quil gave the woman an apologetic look.

The woman just sniffed at him and walked away.

Claire made a face. "Whoops." She giggled.

"See what I mean about the PDA?" Quil grumbled. He was not very happy with himself. That was exactly the sort of thing he was trying to avoid. If he was going to get turned on just by watching Claire eat an ice cream cone, there was no way he was going to be able to control himself when she decided to pull another stunt on him like the lap dance episode.

Quil stood up. "Come on, I've got to get home," he mumbled.


	6. To Hell With Good Intentions

**Chapter Title taken from the song "To Hell With Good Intentions" by Mclusky.**

* * *

All Quil meant to do was drop Claire off. Drop her off and take his Easy Mac and beer and go home. That was all. Nothing else. It was that God damned ice cream cone that was his undoing. The more he had thought about they way she looked licking it, the more turned on he got. When they got to Claire's house and she asked him to come in, informing him that no one was home, he nodded his head no.

"Okay." He had heard himself say. _Damn it! _

Well fine he would go in but _NOTHING _was going to happen. Which was why he was rather shocked to find himself on Claire's bed, Claire laying on top of him, his tongue tangling with hers in a series of very serious kisses.

Quil managed to break his lips away from Claire's long enough to gasp, "We are going to be in so much trouble for this. This, this…..this is not supervised."

"So?" Claire attached her lips to his neck and began licking and sucking on the sensitive spot behind his ear.

"Oh God," Quil whispered, his eyes rolling back in his head. With a growl he flipped them both over and attacked Claire's lips again. Claire hooked her leg around his waist and pushed herself up against him creating a delicious friction that Quil couldn't help but push back against. His hand reached down and played with the hem of her shirt, pushing it up, his fingers brushing her stomach. Claire broke their kiss and looked down at his hand.

"Oh sorry," Quil quickly pulled his hand away.

"No, it's okay." She looked back up into his eyes. "It's okay," she repeated.

Quil took a deep shuddering breath and placed his hand back on her stomach. They both watched Quil's hand as if hypnotized as it slowly traveled upward, his fingers brushing against the swell of Claire's breast. He looked into Claire's eyes, gauging her reaction as he moved his hand up higher, then ever so lightly he brushed his thumb against her nipple, his fingers relishing to silky feel of her bra combined with the hard nub underneath. Claire sighed as he brushed his thumb against her again, then reached up and crushed her lips against his. Quil moaned into her mouth and allowed his other hand to join his first under her shirt, gently stroking, then squeezing, then brushing again. Then suddenly, almost as if he just realized what he was doing, Quil froze.

"What's the matter," Claire pulled back and looked imploringly into Quil's eyes.

"We shouldn't be doing this," Quil whispered. He slowly moved his hands and pulled Claire's shirt down.

Before Claire could protest, Claire's bedroom door opened and a loud "AHEM," from the doorway startled them both.

Quil yelped and threw himself off Claire onto the floor.

Claire hurriedly sat up and frowned. "GOD GRACE CAN'T YOU KNOCK?!"

Claire's older sister Grace gave her a snotty smile. "What fun would that be? Does mom know about this?" She waved her hand at Quil who was still on the floor.

Claire's eyes widened. "Grace, we weren't really doing anything."

"Oh no? It sure looked real cozy."

"Please don't tell mom, okay? I swear I'll do anything. I'll do your laundry for a week, I'll do your chores for a month. Anything okay? Just don't get Quil in trouble."

"Why wouldn't I want to get Quil in trouble?" She asked her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Quil made a face. He and Grace had always had a love/hate relationship, which the last few years had centered mostly around the hate side. Quil always felt that Grace had an underlying jealousy about the way her parents treated him. She seemed to resent the attention that Claire received as the baby of the family, and while it hadn't been that bad at first, since Grace had turned sixteen, she had really become, in Quil's opinion, a conniving bitch.

"Grace….please." Claire gave her sister a pleading look.

Grace sighed. "Fine, I won't say anything. But…laundry for two weeks."

Quil scowled at Grace's back as she walked out, then got off the floor and sat on the edge of Claire's bed. "I really hope she doesn't say anything," he said, worry etched in his words. "I knew this was a bad idea."

Claire sighed. "She won't say anything. She may be a bitch, but she's still my sister. We look out for each other."

"I hope you're right," Quil fretted. He was already feeling the deep seeded guilt and panic bubbling up in his chest at the thought of Sharon or Sam finding out about this situation. His hands trembled and he took deep breaths, trying to get himself under control.

"Quil," Claire leaned over and rubbed his back. "It's going to be fine."

Quil nodded. "I better go," he muttered.

He stood up and without a backwards glance, he dragged himself out.

* * *

"My life sucks!" Quil stormed into the house, dropped the grocery bags on the kitchen counter and threw himself down on the living room sofa.

Seth glanced over at him. "Gandhi feeling frustrated?"

"You know this imprinting thing? Total scam. Seriously, I think it's just all made up mumbo jumbo to fuck with our minds. I mean you imprint on someone and then you're stuck with them for life? How is that fair? And what if the one you're stuck with is a total temptress who lives to make your life a living hell?!"

Seth nodded. "Ahh I see what this is all about. Was Claire wearing the tiny skirt again?"

Quil made a disgusted noise and threw Seth a dirty look. "No. She was….she was eating an ice cream cone."

Seth's gave Quil a mock look of horror. "Oh my God the nerve. How did she become such a whore? I mean eating ice cream?"

"I'm being serious Seth. It wasn't just that. I mean one second I'm watching her eat an ice cream cone, the next thing I know, we're making out on a public bench. Then I drive her home and she's all 'come in nobody's home' and I'm all shaking my head no but saying yes and I go in and she's all 'let's go to my room' and I'm all 'we shouldn't' but then I think of the ice cream thing and bam there we are making out on her bed. And I'm supposed to be the responsible one. To top it off Grace came in. I don't think she saw anything because I had stopped, but you know….I was on top of Claire, so she knows something was up." Quil sighed. "Man, I can't take much more of this."

"Can't take much more of what?" Embry ambled into the living room, cold pizza in hand and flopped into the recliner next to Seth's.

"Claire," Seth answered for Quil.

"What this shit again?" Embry sighed. "I can't even stand to listen to it anymore."

"You guys don't have any idea what this is like," Quil moaned.

"But apparently I'm going to be listening to it again," Embry muttered.

"No, I'm serious Em. You guys have got it made. Embry you can go out with whoever you want. Sleep with whoever you want. And Seth you have Julie who is totally legal. But me? No, I have to be bound by some weird ass mystical force to a fourteen-year-old who is not only driving me crazy, but is making it really hard for me to not break the law." Quil sighed. "I mean do you even _know_ how long it's been since I've had sex with anyone besides myself?" He made a weak jacking off gesture with his fist. "Seriously, I think I'm chafed."

"What about the "lap dance"?" Seth made air quotes.

"Totally doesn't count," Embry said. "She rubbed her ass on him and he blew his load in his pants."

"Ugh!" Seth gave Embry a disgusted look.

"Do you have to be so crude?" Quil growled.

"Whatever bro, I just say it like it is." Embry took a bite of pizza and smiled.

"I'm serious guys, this is getting bad. I'm really, really having a hard time not becoming a pedophile."

"Will you quit saying that? You aren't a pedophile, she's your soul mate, you love her she loves you blah, blah, blah just fuck already."

Quil looked at Embry in amazement. "Dude, what the hell happened to you? You used to be all quiet and……normal."

Embry shrugged. "I just can't hear about Claire anymore man. I mean I live with you, I work with you, I patrol with you. All day and all night it's the same thing Claire, Claire, Claire. If I didn't think I'd get in trouble, I'd kill you in your sleep."

"Well I'm sorry if my problems are such an inconvenience for you," Quil spat out bitterly.

"It's not an inconvenience, it's just boring as hell," Embry replied. "It's like I've been listening to the same damn song on repeat for six months. I just want to hear a new song, you know?"

Seth frowned at Embry. "Look Quil, I realize this is tough for you, but I really think the person you need to be having this conversation with is Claire. I mean have you talked to her about how you feel?"

"Yeah, but I don't know if she really understands. I mean I picked her up at school today, and she jumps on me in the parking lot and kisses me in front of God and everybody. Then she sits there eating her ice cream all sexy and I'm supposed to just ignore it?"

"First of all, if the only thing she has to do to get you this worked up is eat ice cream, I honestly think you have bigger problems."

"Hello? I haven't had sex in eight years!"

"All right all right, will you calm down!" Seth made a downward motion with his hands.

"Oh my God, screw calming down. Just do it already and get it over with!" Embry moaned.

Quil's eyes widened. "Good idea! Then I'll just sit here and wait for Sam and Sharon to send a lynch mob to come kill me! I mean Sam already disapproves of the fact that we're "dating", and I use that term loosely. I can't even imagine his reaction if we were to have sex."

"Dude, we're all going to see what the hell you guys are doing anyway, do you really think he's not going to know the problem your having?" Embry said.

Quil sighed. "You know what? Just forget it. I'll figure this out on my own."

"Thank God! I mean I love you man, but I was serious before about killing you." Embry laughed, then seeing the look on Quil's face hurriedly stood up and left the room.

Seth waited until he heard Embry's door close, then leaned towards Quil. "Look, why don't you try _not_ thinking about being with her when you're with her."

"Huh?"

Seth glanced around quickly, eyes darting left and right.

Quil followed his look, confusion plastered on his face.

Seth motioned Quil closer.

Quil gave him a strange look. "You don't want to like make out or anything, right?"

Seth sighed. "No dumb ass, I'm about to reveal information to you that I have managed to keep from the entire pack for a very, very long time. And," he held up a hand, "I would like to keep it that way please."

"You sure that's such a good idea? I mean I spend so much time trying to keep Claire out of my mind that pretty much everything else is up for grabs."

"Well how's this. Anyone finds out about this...Embry won't be the only one in line to kill you." Seth gave Quil a meaningful look.

"Umm, okay….I can't make any guarantees."

Seth closed his eyes for a moment, seeming to be struggling with something. Then he opened his eyes and let out a deep breath. "Okay, your needs right now are greater than mine. I'm willing to make this sacrifice for you."

"Uh, thanks?" Quil was getting confused as hell.

Seth leaned in close again, and barely speaking above a whisper said, "Okay, so a long time ago…….a LONG time ago, I used to have a problem…..sexually."

Quil immediately sat back. "Dude, I don't really think I want to know where this is going."

"Would you shut up and just listen!" Seth scolded.

"Okay…."

"Right so I had this problem…..sexually. I would get you know….too excited."

Quil frowned. "I'm not following you."

Seth sighed. "I would….finish before the party even started. Get my drift?"

Quil thought for a moment. Suddenly his eyes widened. "Holy shit you're a premature ejaculator!?" He shouted.

"Jesus Quil, could you say that any louder? I don't think the entire neighborhood heard you! And _NO_ by the way. I used to have a slight problem. I don't anymore, okay?"

"Okay, okay."

"Okay. So remember when I was going out with Jennie Thompkins?"

"Jennie who'll do anything for a penny, Jennie?" Quil snickered.

"That was such an undeserved nickname."

"Oh come on Seth. She was a total slut."

"Fine, she was a slut, but I'll always be grateful to that slut, you know why?"

"Umm because she was a slut?"

"NO, damn it are you going to take this seriously or not?"

Quil threw up his hands. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're grateful to the slut. Why?"

"Because, when we first started going out and we would be messing around, I would….you know."

"Yeah, I know."

"Right, so Jennie taught me a little trick. Don't think about what you're doing. Think about something that's a total turn off, you know like your mom or something."

"Wait…..you think about your mom when you're having sex?"

"You know what, forget it. I can't even talk to you." Seth started to stand up.

"Wait, wait," Quil grabbed Seth's arm and pulled him back into the recliner. "I'm sorry. Go on."

"No more smart ass comments?"

Quil made an X over his heart. "Scout's honor."

Seth nodded. "Okay, so what Jennie taught me to do is think about something totally unrelated to sex, you know, like school, or work, or sports, whatever. And I'm telling you it works. I could go all night with no problems."

Quil nodded. "Okay, but how does that help me? I'm not trying to last longer, I'm trying to not even start."

"It's the same principle. You think about things that totally turn you off, and you'll be fine. My old standby…..mothballs."

"Mothballs? OHHH this explains the whole McDonald's outburst much more clearly."

"Yeah, well my mom was always putting them in my closet. I hated how they smelled. I even hated touching them. I could last for hours on mothballs alone."

"Huh. Well Seth…..thanks, I guess. That was interesting and more than a little disturbing."

Seth just shook his head. "You'll thank me later." He stood up. "Just remember, anyone finds out about this conversation." He drew his thumb across his neck.

"Got it."

"Alright. Well I've given you what I can. You're on your own now." Seth began walking to the hallway.

"Guess I am," Quil sighed. "Hey, Seth?"

Seth paused and turned around.

"Thanks man."

Seth nodded. "No problem."

Embry stuck his head around the corner from the hallway. "You could always jerk off before you go see her. That sometimes works."

"WERE YOU THERE THE WHOLE TIME?!" Seth screamed.

"Ummm…noooooo….."

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

Embry laughed like a hyena and took off for the front door, Seth in his wake.

Quil laughed when he heard two sets of clothing ripping before they were off the front porch. He shook his head and sat for another moment. "Mothballs," he muttered. "Jesus."

* * *

"GRACE LOUISE THIS IS NOT UP FOR DISCUSSION!"

"MOM! YOU ARE BEING TOTALLY UNREASONABLE!"

Quil closed the back door at Claire's house and winced at the screaming coming from upstairs. Grace was a total drama queen and at least once a week he walked in on a screaming match between Grace and her mother Sharon.

"YOU LET QUIL IN CLAIRE'S ROOM ALL THE TIME!"

Quil frowned. He never liked being dragged into arguments in the Ortecho home.

"THAT IS A TOTALLY DIFFERENT SITUATION AND YOU KNOW IT!"

"HOW? HOW IS IT DIFFERENT?!"

"BECAUSE I TRUST QUIL!"

Quil smiled at that. He and Sharon had always gotten along very well.

"OH YEAH? WELL DID CLAIRE TELL YOU WHAT THEY WERE DOING UP THERE YESTERDAY?"

Quil's smile fell immediately. Grace had sworn to keep her mouth shut. He should have known that she would tattle first chance she got.

"GRACE!" Claire's voice suddenly entered into the screaming match.

Quil was debating about making a quick exit when the swinging door between the kitchen and the living room flew open and a teenage boy that Quil had never seen before hustled through it, clothes disheveled, face beet red.

He was so busy beating his retreat that he nearly ran into Quil who hadn't moved from his position in front of the back door. The boy stopped short and Quil watched as the boy's gaze traveled up from his feet to his torso to finally Quil's face which was looking back down at him, one eyebrow cocked, an amused expression on his face.

"Jesus," the boy whispered.

"Actually I'm going by Quil now, but thanks."

The boy backed up several steps and stared.

"Need to get out this door, huh?" Quil gestured to the door behind him.

The boy nodded.

"Sharon threw you out, huh?"

The boy swallowed and nodded again.

Quil chuckled and stepped aside, sweeping his arm in a grand gesture towards the door.

"She's all yours."

The boy slowly moved forward, turning his body to the side and pressing himself against the kitchen counter to be as far from Quil as possible. Suddenly he dashed to the back door, threw it open and raced out of the house.

Quil snickered. He loved it when people were afraid of him.

Suddenly the kitchen door swung open again and Sharon walked in, her face looking haggard.

She noticed Quil and sighed. "Hi Quil."

Quil nodded. "Sharon. I see you scared the hell out of Grace's newest 'friend'."

"It's a gift." Sharon opened the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water. "Do I even want to know what Grace was talking about with regards to you and Claire in her room?" She took a sip of water and gave Quil a narrow eyed glare.

Quil threw up his hands. "Nothing! You know Grace, she likes to you know….stir up the pot." Quil made a weak stirring gesture then dropped his hands to his sides.

Sharon rolled her eyes. "You're a lousy liar," she said.

"It's the eyes, isn't it? They don't hide anything."

"That and the very guilty look on your face."

"Oh…that."

"Yeah that. At least tell me it was from the neck up."

Quil shuffled his feet. "Okay."

Sharon glared. "The waist up?"

"No, I mean yes. Nothing below the waist."

Sharon glared even harder.

"My hands were never below her waist. I swear."

"Quil, am I going to have to kick your ass? I may be short, but I think my rage would give me a big edge."

"Sharon," Quil sighed. "I'm trying. It's a lot harder than I thought. And she's not making it any easier."

Sharon sighed, too. "All right, I'll talk to her." She took another sip of water and sighed again. "Well you might as well go on up, the fireworks are over. I know you like to avoid those."

Quil nodded and started to walk out of the kitchen.

"Quil?"

"Yeah?"

"I was serious about kicking your ass. She may be pushing it, but you are the adult. Act like it."

Quil nodded again. "Yes ma'am."

Sharon smiled. "That's my boy."

Quil started to leave again.

"I'm right downstairs."

Quil's shoulder's slumped as he walked out of the kitchen.

* * *

Quil walked up the stairs leading to the girl's bedrooms. He could hear Grace sobbing behind her door and got a small amount of pleasure out of hearing her suffering. She deserved it for selling him out.

He stopped at Claire's door and knocked.

"GO AWAY GRACE!"

"It's me," Quil said.

The door flew open and Claire stood before him, her face bright red. "Get in here." She grabbed the front of Quil's shirt and dragged him into her room, slamming the door behind him.

When the door was shut, she began pacing, marching around piles of clothes and books, all the while muttering under breath.

"Total traitor….swore she wouldn't tell….I can't believe her. YOU ARE SUCH A TRAITOR GRACE!"

Quil smiled when he heard a muffled "SHUT UP CLAIRE!" from Grace's room.

"Can you believe her?" Claire's pacing picked up speed. "She told mom everything she saw!"

Quil managed to maneuver around the pacing Claire and sat on the edge of her bed. "Claire, she really didn't see that much."

"So? That's not the point. She told mom that we were fooling around in here. That's enough to make her a TRAITOR!"

"I CAN HEAR YOU!" Grace shouted.

"GOOD! I WANT YOU TO HEAR ME!"

"Claire, for God's sake will you calm down! You're making me dizzy. Just…." Quil snatched Claire's arm on one of her passes and pulled her down on the bed next to him. "Calm down, I talked to your mom, okay? Given the circumstances, she's being pretty cool."

Claire sighed. "I know. I just, I don't want you to get in trouble."

"Well if you don't want me to get in trouble, maybe you should stop jumping me every time we're alone together."

Claire's eyes widened. "I do NOT jump you every time we are alone."

Quil raised his eyebrows. "Oh really?"

"I'm not jumping you now am I?"

"Not yet."

"So what I'm some kind of slut?"

"What? Whoa where did that come from?"

"I'm just saying if you don't want me touching you, then maybe you shouldn't be here, that's all."

Quil frowned. "What the hell is going on here? What, you're pissed at me?"

Claire jumped off the bed. "No, I'm just saying that you know, if you're so sickened when I touch you then maybe you should go."

"Claire, come off it. I'm just trying to play by the rules, and you aren't helping."

"Well maybe that's because I don't want to play anymore."

Claire suddenly straddled Quil's lap and attached her lips to his neck.

"Claire, you're mom is right downstairs." Quil weakly tried to push Claire off of his lap.

"So?" Claire breathed into his ear.

"So, this is exactly what I'm talking about."

"What…this?" Claire ground herself against his arousal and sucked his earlobe into her mouth.

Quil's eyes fluttered in the back of his head. With a growl he grabbed her hair with his hands and pulled her head back before crushing his lips against hers. His tongue traced her lips, then dipped into her mouth. His hands let go of her hair and grabbed her ass, his hands going underneath her skirt, pulling her closer against him.

"Claire?"

With a grunt Quil shoved Claire off his lap. With a surprised "OH" she landed on her butt on the floor.

The bedroom door opened and Sharon stepped into the room.

"Hey mom," Claire said weakly from the floor. "Have you seen my Anne Frank? I think it's on the floor here somewhere, but I just can't seem to find it." Claire made a lame attempt to look for her book under the bed.

"Quil?" Sharon did not look amused.

"Yes ma'am?"

"Go home."

Quil stood up, hands trying to subtly cover the front of his pants. "Yes ma'am."

He gave Sharon a lame smile that was not returned and quickly ran out of the room, bound down the flight of stairs in one jump and took off out of the house.


	7. Complicated Questions

**Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed. I really appreciate it. I wouldn't mind more though!**

**Chapter Title taken from the song "Complicated Questions" by Finger Eleven**

* * *

"God, I hate McDonald's," Claire grumbled.

After getting "caught" twice in compromising positions in Claire's bedroom - once by Grace and most recently by Claire's mom - Sharon had decided it was better if Quil did not come home with Claire after school. Quil was still allowed to pick her up, but they had to go to a public place to hang out. Quil had agreed readily enough. He also thought it was a good idea. Things with Claire had been getting a little to intense for his liking, and this was the perfect excuse for them to not hang out in the house alone without it looking like he didn't want to spend time with her. That afternoon they were sitting in a booth at the local McDonald's, Claire's schoolwork spread across the table top.

"What? How can you hate McDonald's? It's like a Mecca. A Mecca of greasy fatty food that all tastes soooo good." Quil smiled around a mouthful of fries.

Claire looked up. "You're disgusting. I mean do you think that looks at _all_ attractive?"

Quil made a face. "What's with the 'tude dude?"

"Okay first off I hate that expression. And you know exactly why I have the 'tude dude'."

Quil sighed. "This is about tonight isn't it? I already told you I promised Seth and Julie I would cover Seth's patrol tonight. He's taking her to some fancy restaurant in Victoria."

Claire sniffed. "I understand, I mean you've only known about this for ages. But by all means help Seth and Julie out."

Quil rolled his eyes. "Claire-bear, I promise next football game I'll be in the front row to see you cheer."

"I'll believe it when I see it." Claire grumbled.

Quil didn't respond. He knew he was letting Claire down, but he just didn't think he could handle watching her parade around in her tiny cheerleading skirt. He was determined to not let things get out of control. The cheerleading uniform was something that tended to put very, very bad thoughts into his head. When Seth had approached him about covering patrol, Quil had jumped at the opportunity.

Quil and Claire sat in silence for awhile, Quil working his way through a tray full of food, Claire studiously working on her homework. It was about twenty minutes later when Quil noticed Claire scrutinizing him.

"Quil, I want to talk about something very important." Claire set her pen on her notebook and folded her hands on their booth's table.

Quil cocked an eyebrow at her and said, "What's that?"

Claire gave Quil a serious look. "As you know the Homecoming Dance is a couple of weeks away."

Quil rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to protest.

Claire held her hand up. "Shush. Let me finish. You owe me one anyway since you can't be bothered to come watch me cheer. Now like I was saying the Homecoming Dance is a couple of weeks away. And since I've realized I'm going to be waiting forever for you to ask me out on another date, _I'm_ going to ask _you_. Will you please go to the Homecoming Dance with me?"

Quil sighed. "Claire….no."

Claire smiled for half a second. Then her face fell. "What! What do you mean _no_?" She said the no as if it were a dirty word.

"I mean no. Dates around here are one thing. A date at the high school? Totally different."

"Why? Why is it any different?"

"Because I think the school would probably have a problem with the fact that your date graduated from high school ten years ago."

Claire made a face. "Who cares?"

Quil pointed at himself. "I care."

"Quil, you are morally obligated, as my boyfriend to do whatever it is I ask. It's in the dating contract. Look it up. I want to go to this dance and you are going to take me."

Quil smiled. "Well when you put it that way," he stopped smiling. "No."

Claire looked around and then said loudly, "You were so much nicer when we talked on the internet!"

Quil, who had been taking a sip of his soda, jumped as though he had been goosed. Soda squirted out of his nose. He coughed and glared at Claire. "That's so inappropriate. I mean not even funny at all."

Claire made a face. "It was a little funny. Besides nobody even turned to look. And that was way worse than taking me to some dance. So just take me, okay?"

"After that stunt, let me think. Ummm no."

"Quil, come on-"

"No."

"What if we-"

"NO."

Claire pouted. "Pweese?" She begged.

Quil grunted. "I'll think about it."

Claire gave a small squeal and clapped her hands.

"Hey, I said I'd think about it. That isn't a definite yes." Quil informed her.

Claire gave him a knowing smile. "Oh I know. I just think it's so sexy when you try to put up a fight."

Quil frowned. "Do your homework," he grumbled.

"Actually, I kind of wanted to talk to you about something else."

Quil dropped his head back on his neck and sighed. "What did I do to deserve this?" he moaned.

Claire slapped his hand. "You should really read the dating contract closer. It also states that when I want to talk about something, you give me your full undivided attention."

"There is _no_ dating contract. And if there were it would also say that you would hush up, finish your homework and let me eat my fries in peace."

"Whatever. This is important."

"Fine. You have my undivided attention. What's up?"

"You remember when we had that really bad fight a few months ago?"

Quil nodded. How could he forget?

"Well, remember when I accused you of sleeping with another girl, and you said you had?"

Quil looked down at the table and scratched his eyebrow uncomfortably. "Yeah," he said slowly.

"I want to know about her. I want to know everything."

"You want to talk about this now? Here?" He gestured at the crowded restaurant.

Claire shook her head. "Yes."

Quil wondered how it was he was getting roped into yet another inappropriate conversation at a McDonald's. If this trend kept up he was going to be banned for life.

"What do you want to know?" He sighed.

"How old was she? And how old were you?"

"Why does that matter?"

"Because I want to know."

Quil sighed again. "She was twenty-one when we met. I was eighteen."

"Hm. Did you date her? Or just sleep with her?"

"We didn't date," he said quietly.

"Interesting." Claire said in a snotty tone.

"I already told you I was sorry and it wouldn't happen again. Why are you bringing this up now?"

"Because we _are_ dating. I just find it interesting that you slept with some girl that you never even dated, and I can barely get you to hold my hand in public, let alone take me to my Homecoming."

"Claire one has nothing to do with the other."

"They have everything to do with each other!"

"Hey, calm down." Quil rubbed his eyes. "Explain what you're trying to say."

"I'm saying that you were willing to sleep with a girl that you barely knew and you don't want to sleep with me."

Quil's eyes widened. "When did sex even come into this? I've already told you my feelings about this whole situation. I don't want to discuss it again."

"You know, I turn fifteen in a week. What are you going to say then?"

Quil raised his eyebrows. "Well I'll probably say what I've been saying. That we should really put a hold on the physical stuff until you're sixteen."

"And when I turn sixteen? Will you change your mind again? Up it to seventeen? Eighteen? Hell maybe we should just wait until I'm twenty-one. Then I could take you to a bar, get you drunk and seduce you."

"That won't be necessary."

"I still don't get this. I mean, I know you've had sex before. So I can't help feeling that it's not just the age thing. Because you _know_ we're going to be together forever. You knew you weren't going to be with that other girl when you slept with her, but you slept with her just the same."

Quil shook his head. "Totally different situation."

"Why is it different?"

"Because those other girls weren't you!" Quil snapped.

"Wait…..girls? Plural?" Claire narrowed her eyes at Quil. "How many girls have you been with?"

"Hmm, what?" Quil asked innocently.

"Don't do that."

"Do what? What'd I do?"

"Don't try to play innocent. You said 'girls'. Plural. I want to know how many girls you've been with." Claire sat back, her arms folded across her chest.

"Umm, well I mean does that really matter?"

Claire nodded emphatically. "Yes it matters!" She snapped.

"Claire, it doesn't matter how many girls I've been with. I mean, the only thing that will come of this conversation is you getting upset."

Claire's eyes widened. "I'll get upset? Like more than I already am? Jesus, how many girls have you _been_ with Don Juan?"

Quil looked down, his fingers tearing at the corner of his sandwich wrapper. "Ummm….something like….simmmmpphhh." He mumbled.

"I'm sorry what was that?" Claire asked, her voice filled with venom.

Quil sighed. "I said something like six."

"SOMETHING LIKE SIX! How can it be something like six? What the hell does that even mean?"

Quil glanced around quickly. "Would you lower your voice. We should not be talking about this here."

Claire glared. "What does something like six mean?" She said in a low, tight voice.

Quil cleared his throat. "It means that… one girl I didn't have ummm you know, intercourse with," he said quietly.

Claire made a face. "You didn't have intercourse with….then why would you…..OHHH I get it," she spat at him. "She just sucked your dick is that it?"

Quil grabbed his tray. "Okay, we're leaving now. Get your stuff together."

"Well tell me, I'm just curious. How many of these girls were _after _you imprinted on me?"

"Just one, I swear, and I haven't been with anyone in eight years, I told you that." Quil looked pleadingly into Claire's eyes. "Please let's not do this."

"Do what?" Claire snapped.

"Fight about this, please, I can't stand this. It makes me feel sick. Like physically sick."

"Yeah, well I'm feeling pretty sick right now too." Claire said quietly.

"Claire, I admit I had a life before I imprinted on you. But other than my one indiscretion, I have not touched another woman since the day I met you. I have already apologized for the mistake I made. I _refuse_ to let you be mad at me for things I did before I even met you."

Claire dropped her head and sighed. "You're right. I'm sorry. I had no right to get mad at you. I know you had a life before me. It's just that I love you so much and the thought of you with another girl…ugh God… girls, I hate it."

"Look, Claire. Yes I've been with other girls. But that does not mean that when we're together like that…" Quil saw Claire glance up at him. "Way, _way_ in the future when we're together like that, that it's going to be any less special. In fact it will be the most special time for me ever. _Ever_. I just really need you to be patient with this stuff. I need you to do that for me. It's in the dating contract."

Claire gave a small giggle. "I'm sorry. I know I'm driving you crazy. I don't mean too. I just can't seem to help myself when I'm around you."

"Ditto," Quil replied. "I know it's hard but we really have to try, okay?"

Claire nodded. She suddenly smiled. "You know what would probably help? If you agreed to take me to Homecoming."

Quil narrowed his eyes. "Get your stuff, we're going." He carried his tray to the garbage then turned to watch Claire gathering her books at the booth.

She was right when she said she was driving him crazy. He felt like he had been on an emotional roller coaster the last few months. He realized that he was going to really have to acknowledge how much their relationship had changed lately. For a brief moment he wished things could go back to the way they were, before everything had gotten so complicated. But as he watched Claire walking towards him, her long silky hair spilling over her shoulders , her hips swaying just slightly as she walked, he thought that maybe, deep in the recesses of his mind, he was glad for the complications.

* * *

"And the food was amazing!"

Julie and Seth were cuddling on the couch giving Quil the details about their evening in Victoria.

"Well I'm glad you guys had a nice time," Quil said.

It was almost one o'clock in the morning. Seth and Julie had gotten back about ten minutes before and Quil had walked in a few minutes after them from patrol.

"You guys want to watch a movie?" He asked. Patrolling when nothing was going on always left him feeling keyed up and he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep for a while yet.

Seth looked at Julie who shrugged. "Why not."

Quil poured over the DVD selection, finally deciding on a mindless comedy. He put the movie on and collapsed into one of the two recliners. They had watched about ten minutes when Embry walked into the living room and plopped dejectedly down into a chair.

"Ahummm."

Quil narrowed his eyes and tried to concentrate on the movie they were watching.

"AAHUMMMM," Embry sighed again.

Quil dropped his head back on the recliner. "Something on your mind, Em?" He asked, a touch of sarcasm tainting his words.

"No," Embry replied sulkily.

Quil rolled his eyes. Mentally he counted _one, two, three and go_.

"Well," Embry started.

Quil and Seth both groaned. Quil paused the movie and spun his chair around to face the one Embry was sitting in.

"Let's have it." He waved his hands in a come on gesture.

"Well it's just, it's Kate. She's so…..I don't know." Embry made a sad puppy face. "Never mind."

_One, two, three and go_.

"Well," Embry started again. "She's just so frustrating."

Embry had been dating Kate Channing for a little over a month. They had met at the machine shop where Embry, Seth and Quil all worked. She had been there to speak to the shop's health benefits coordinator, representing her insurance company. Embry had taken one look at her and asked her out on the spot. To everyone's surprise she had said yes.

"Ahhh," Seth nodded his head. "I know what this is all about. You haven't banged her yet, have you?"

"Seth!" Julie smacked Seth's arm.

"Not even close!" Embry said, clearly annoyed. "If Bang Her was an island in the Caribbean , Kate and I are stuck in traffic in Jersey."

Quil gave Embry an appreciative look. "That's actually pretty clever."

Embry shrugged. "I got it from a movie. Either way this chick is not giving it up. I don't get it. I've been nice, I've been charming, I've been downright disgustingly sweet. Why won't she fuck me?"

Julie made a face. "Well maybe because she doesn't want to be '_fucked_'."

"She's all 'I want to get to know you'. What the hell is that? And now I'm stuck. I can't use my boxer trick because she isn't sleeping with me!" Embry tossed his hands up in exacerbation.

"Boxer trick?" Julie questioned. "Do I even want to know what that is?"

"Embry has this thing about being the bad guy. He never wants to be the one to break up with the girl he's seeing. So what he'll do is take a pair of boxers the girl has never seen before to the girls house, stuff them in the couch and then 'find' them." Seth explained. "He accuses the girl of cheating on him until the girl gets so pissed _she_ breaks up with _him_. Ergo he's not the bad guy for dumping her. " He shrugged at Julie's confused look. "I don't get it either. His brain is warped…just a theory."

"It totally makes sense!" Embry snapped. "'Cause when the next girl I date asks why I broke up with the last girl, I can get all upset and say it's 'cause she cheated on me. It makes me look all vulnerable and then boom. The chick sleeps with me faster. It has never failed."

"Until now," Quil pointed out.

Embry nodded in defeat. "Until now," he admitted. "I mean what's her problem? I'm sexy, right?" When no one answered he said louder. "RIGHT?"

"Oh, yeah totally," Quil said.

"Thank you. I mean Julie, you'd fuck me, right?"

"HEY!" Seth jumped off the couch and snarled at Embry.

"Seth," Julie grabbed Seth's hand and tried to pull him back onto the couch.

"Whoa, back off Cujo, it was a rhetorical question," Embry said.

"Well keep her out of it," Seth growled.

Embry made a face at Quil. _What the hell_, he mouthed.

Quil shrugged. "Imprint thing," he said. "You wouldn't understand."

"Oh, so you're going to throw _that_ in my face, huh?" Embry said in a hurt voice.

"Oh come off it. You were just saying last week about how you don't want to ever find your imprint because you like your freedom."

Embry nodded. "That's true. I mean if I had to end up like you or Seth I'd probably kill myself."

"I happen to be very happy," Seth said, a contented smile on his face.

"Me too, baby," Julie said giving him a kiss.

"Blech, do you see? It's so much easier to love 'em and leave 'em. And Kate is screwing with my whole philosophy. I mean I give and I give and I give. What more do I have to do? You know what it is?" Embry didn't wait for anyone to answer before he rambled on. "They have the boobs and the bush."

"Ugh," Julie gave Embry a disgusted look.

Embry ignored her. "So the women have all the power. It's _totally_ unfair."

"_You're_ telling _me_?" Quil piped up. "I spent the afternoon being shaken down by a one hundred and ten pound cheerleader."

Embry made a face. "You know what I find amazing? I'm trying to have a discussion about ME and you manage to turn it into a discussion about you and Claire. AGAIN!"

Quil looked properly chastised. "You're right I'm sorry. Go ahead and finish."

Embry opened his mouth and then promptly closed it. "I was done," he said primly, leaning back in his chair.

Quil sat for a moment waiting to see if Embry was really done. When he didn't say anything else Quil spoke up. "Claire asked me to take her to the Homecoming dance."

Embry dropped his chin to his chest and let out an enormous fake snore. He then pretended to jerk awake. "Oh I'm sorry, I thought we were going to have to hear about Claire again."

"Fine, that's fine. I don't have to tell you anything," Quil pouted. He stood up and made to leave the room.

Embry grabbed his arm as he passed and said. "I'm joking, I'm joking."

Quil sat back down. "Okay, well Claire-"

Embry dropped his chin and snored again.

"God, forget it," Quil snapped.

"Quil wait, Embry stop being an ass. Tell us what's going on with Claire," Seth shot Embry a dirty look.

"She wants me to take her to Homecoming. I don't think it's a good idea for me to go on a date at the school. So I told her no."

Seth made a shocked face. "You? You told Claire no?"

"You know, you could get away with that when you weren't imprinted, but now….not cool." Quil said. "I mean Julie has you at her beck and call."

"That is true," Julie said with a smile.

"Anyway now I feel horrible, because she really wants to go. Of course she remains convinced that I'll change my mind."

"I agree with her." Embry said. "I'll bet you anything she'll bat her eyes and flit around in her little skirt and you'll totally cave."

Quil sighed. "Would you please give me some credit. I am not some puppet that she can manipulate to do her whims."

Embry snorted. "Dear Land of Delusion." He mimed writing a letter. "Can you send my balls back in a neat little box with a bow so I can just hand them directly to Claire. Thanks so much. Love, Quil."

Quil scoffed. "I'm serious." He made a determined face. "I'm not going. Not going."

Embry rolled his eyes. "I'm _not_ helping you pick out a suit," he muttered.

"Yeah well that's not even the worst of it." Quil took a deep breath. "Today, she asked what my number was."

"Oooooohhhhh," Seth, Julie and Embry all said simultaneously.

"Tell me about it."

"Well, did you tell her?"

Quil nodded.

"Ohhh, how'd she take it," Seth asked.

"She flipped out. I mean I told her that all but one was before I even met her and she apologized for flipping out, but I mean what the hell? Less than a year ago she was calling me 'big bro' and now she's asking me my number and rubbing all over me like a cat in heat. This has all just happened so fast. I feel like I've been plastered by an eighteen wheeler with 'Claire Express' printed on the side. I'm like lying on the side of the road with my brains sort of spattered all over the place."

"If that's the case, can I have your bedroom?" Embry joked.

Quil laughed. "Leave it to you, Em. I'm spilling my guts and you just step all over it with a smart ass remark."

"Well you've been spilling your guts so much lately that I'm slipping all over the house."

Quil nodded. "You're right, I'm sorry. I know I've been a bitch to live with lately. I really am sorry. I'll try to lay off the Claire stuff for awhile."

"Sounds good." Embry turned to the TV. "So what the hell, let's watch this movie. Jesus you guys talk a lot."

Quil, Seth and Julie all turned and stared at Embry.

"What?" He asked.

Quil just shook his head and pushed play.

They were able to watch ten more minutes before - somewhere in the room - Quil's cell phone began to ring.

"Ohh, speaking of naughty school girls," Embry snickered as he recognized Claire's ring tone.

"Shut up," Quil said distractedly as he searched for his phone. He patted his pockets and not finding it stood and began searching down the sides of the chair.

"We're never going to watch this movie, are we?" Julie complained.

Seth pulled her closer against him and growled into her ear. "You weren't going to be watching much of it anyway."

Embry made a disgusted face. "If you two are going to be groping like a couple of teenagers then you are banned from the living room, right Quil?"

Quil, who had finally unearthed his phone from under the cushion made a shushing gesture with his hand.

"Hey Claire, how was the game? Oh hi Sharon. Really? Is she okay? Yeah it's been awhile. Okay, I'll be right over." Quil flipped his phone closed. "I've got to go." he informed them.

"Everything okay?" Seth asked.

"Yeah it's just Claire's back. I've got to change." Quil walked down the hallway.

"What's wrong with Claire's back?" Julie asked.

"She fell down the stairs when she was a kid and broke a couple of vertebrae. She had to have surgery and they put some screws and stuff in there. Normally when it bothers her she can just take some pain killers and use a heating pad, but sometimes when the weather is funky or she does something to stress it, she needs our boy Quil's healing hands," Embry explained.

"Oh God, well I hope she's okay," Julie said sympathetically.

"She'll be fine," Quil said as he came back into the living room. "I'll see you guys later." He grabbed his car keys and swept out the front door.

* * *

Quil let himself into the Ortecho's home and walked through the kitchen pausing at the door to the living room. He could hear Claire crying and Sharon trying to sooth her. He closed his eyes for a moment. Hearing Claire in pain made his chest ache. He took a deep breath and then walked into the living room.

He saw Claire lying on the couch, Sharon sitting next to her rubbing her back. Claire looked up when Quil walked in, her eyes red and swollen, her face streaked with tears. "Hey," she said hoarsely.

Quil tried to hide his distress at seeing Claire so miserable and said cheerily "Never fear your personal heating pad is here."

"Yay," Claire said weakly.

Sharon stood up and let Quil take her spot on the couch.

"Thanks for coming Quil. I already gave her three of the painkillers. I was afraid to give her anymore and the heating pad shorted out."

"It's no problem at all," Quil said quietly. He placed his hand on Claire's back. "Here?" he asked her. "Or higher?"

"Right there," Claire said, her body already beginning to relax from the heat in his hand. "Rub," she demanded after a moment.

"Yes ma'am," Quil replied. He began rubbing small circles on her back. "You're spoiled rotten you know that?"

"I know," Claire said sleepily. After a few moments her eyes drifted closed.

They sat in silence for awhile. When Quil was sure Claire had fallen asleep, he looked at Sharon.

"So what exactly happened?"

Sharon sighed. "She was on top of the pyramid during the half time routine. One of the girls on the bottom slipped and they all fell. She hit pretty hard but refused to let me take her home. Of course after the fall and then being out there in the cold jumping around, she was already crying by the time we got back to the car. I called your phone, but you didn't answer."

"Yeah I was on patrol," Quil said guiltily.

"Honey, don't feel bad you can't always be at her beck and call."

Quil smiled. "You know it doesn't really work that way."

"I know."

Quil sighed. "Maybe she shouldn't do this cheerleading thing anymore," he suggested.

Sharon shook her head. "I already tried that. She screamed at me. I dropped the subject."

"Well, maybe I'll talk to her about it. I kind of want her to stay in one piece."

"Me too. Give it a try, she might listen to you…..although…after what happened with you two at McDonald's today I wouldn't hold your breath."

Quil winced. "She uhh, she told you about that?" The last thing he needed was Sharon getting an earful from Claire on his sexual history.

"It's just a dance you know. She really wants to go. I hope you'll reconsider."

"Oh, the dance."

Sharon raised her eyebrows. "Was there something else?"

"No," Quil shook his head. "No, that was it. The dance," he said more emphatically when Sharon leveled an unconvinced look at him.

"Well, just think about it, okay?"

"Do you think that's such a good idea? I mean I know I don't look my age, but I definitely look older than her. I mean those teachers are going to know I'm not a high school student."

"So you tell them you're eighteen and go to the Quileute school. Do you think they're going to take the time to check?"

Quil shrugged. "I guess not," he said.

They sat in silence for a little while longer. Quil let out a huge yawn and slid down more into the couch cushions, his hand still rubbing small circles on Claire's back. He felt his eyes getting heavy and he found himself jerking awake several times. Sharon had grabbed a book and was curled up on the chair reading. Quil leaned his head back and looked at the ceiling. After awhile his eyes closed again and a few moments after that, he joined Claire in sleep.

* * *

Quil was woken by the feeling of something pushing into his side. He opened his eyes and looked down to see Claire's feet pushing weakly into his ribcage.

"It's too hot," she mumbled groggily. "Stop touching me."

"Well that's a first," Quil muttered as he took his hand away from Claire's back.

Sharon snorted. "Please try to avoid saying stuff like that in front of me."

Quil started. "Sorry, I didn't realize you were still here," he said sleepily. "What time is it?"

"Almost four," Sharon said.

"Want me to take her upstairs?" Quil asked.

Sharon shook her head. "No, let her sleep. Same with you. You can stay if you want. I don't want you driving home this late."

"I can walk," Quil said with a jaw cracking yawn.

"Don't be silly. You can stay. You look beat."

"Thanks, I think I will." Quil slid off the couch onto the floor. He rolled onto his side next to the couch and before he could tell Sharon good night, he had slipped back into unconsciousness.


	8. The Naughty Song

**Okay guys, so this chapter should probably have an "M" rating. It isn't too descriptive, but descriptive enough that if you don't like a little smut, you should skip the middle part. I tried to be as tasteful as possible (as tasteful as a little bit of smut can be), but just in case _you have been warned_. I mean crimany the chapter is called "The Naughty Song"!**

**Chapter Title taken from the song "The Naughty Song" by Cory Lee**

**PS Just on a side note to Twinsmom:  
**

**1. Thanks for all the reviews. I appreciate them! That goes for all of you who have reviewed!**

**2. It wasn't because it was late...it's because it was flipping funny. Of course this is coming from the person who wrote it so you can take my opinion with a grain of salt.**

**3. I'm obviously not a doctor, so I took literary license on that bit, however I will say that one of my best friends has a steel rod and bunch of screws in her back (from scoliosis not an injury so I don't know if that makes a difference) and she rides competitive hunter/jumpers with me. However she will not jump my horse because he tends to be a dirty stopper and she does have to be very careful about falling off. So there ya go. I just figured I'd put my 2 cents in!**

* * *

"GRACE! YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES TO GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!"

"I'M COMING! GOD!"

Quil awoke with a groan. His arm was asleep from where he had been lying on it all night and his neck had one hell of a crick.

"GRACE!!" Sharon yelled again from the kitchen.

"I SAID I WAS COMING!" Grace shrieked.

"Oh my God," Quil muttered.

"Morning sunshine."

Quil opened his eyes and looked up. Claire was sitting on the couch, right leg crossed over left giving Quil an amused expression.

"Morning," Quil replied groggily. "How's your back?"

"Great, thanks to my 'personal heating pad'." She smiled at him.

"Good, that's good." Quil climbed onto the couch from the floor and sat next to her. "I was worried," he said quietly. "I wish you wouldn't do this cheerleading thing anymore."

"You've been talking to my mother." Claire accused him.

"I just don't want you to get hurt."

"Well I'm fine," Claire assured him. She looked up at him. "You talk in your sleep."

"So I've been told," he said and then winced. He didn't want to remind her of their conversation from yesterday.

If Claire noticed his slip, she didn't mention it. Instead she uncrossed her legs and moved so that she was kneeling next to him on the couch. "It's very cute," she said leaning over to give him a kiss.

"Blah, don't do that I have morning breath." Quil made a face.

Claire shrugged. "I don't care." She looked at him for another moment, a pleased smile on her face. "Want to know what you were talking about?"

"What?" Quil asked with a yawn.

"Me." Claire informed him smugly.

"Is that right? Was I mentioning what a pain in my ass you are?"

"Noooo, however you did mention my ass."

Quil gave her a strange look. "Really? Did I say anything else?"

Claire nodded. "You sure did and let's just say it's a good thing my mom went up to bed before you started yammering." She leaned closer to Quil and whispered into his ear. "You were saying some very, very naughty things."

Quil swallowed hard. "Really?"

"GRACE!!"

Quil and Claire both jumped and automatically moved further apart on the couch as Sharon stormed into the living room.

"Good morning Quil. GRACE LOUISE RIGHT NOW!"

"Morning Sharon. I see it's going to be another fun filled day in the Ortecho home." Quil smirked.

Sharon glanced at her watch. "Grace has soccer practice in less than twenty minutes," She said annoyed. "Do you think she could be ready on time? GRACE!" She turned and looked at Quil. "You hungry? I have some cereal out on the counter. Claire already ate."

Quil nodded. "I could eat," he said. He stood up and stretched.

"I'm going to kill her. GRACE!" Sharon threw her coat and purse onto a chair and stormed up the stairs.

"Come on, I'll make you a bowl of cereal." Claire grabbed Quil's hand and pulled him into the kitchen.

"What do you want? We have Cheerio's, Lucky Charms and ohhhh your favorite Coco Puffs."

Quil nodded. "Hook me up with the chocolate."

Claire pulled down a large mixing bowl and filled it with cereal. She then poured milk into the bowl and grabbed a large spoon. "Here." She said as she put the bowl in front of Quil.

"Thanks." Quil grabbed the spoon and began to eat.

Claire leaned on the breakfast bar next to him. "So?"

Quil looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "So what?"

"Have you thought about homecoming anymore?"

Quil sighed. "You have to give me more than twenty-four hours to think."

"I don't have that kind of time! I need to buy a dress A-sap."

"Are you going to consider quitting cheerleading?"

Claire shook her head. "No," she said stubbornly.

"Well then right now my answer is hell no I won't go." He said the last part like he was chanting at a protest.

Claire frowned. "FINE!" She shouted. With a huff she turned and stormed out of the kitchen.

Quil sighed. Now he felt even more horrible than he had yesterday. But God he really did not want to go. And if she wasn't going to even consider the cheerleading thing, he wasn't going to consider the dance.

"I don't know why we have to have practice so early anyway!" Grace was still yelling as she and Sharon breezed through the kitchen door.

"Just go get in the car."

Grace grumbled under her breath and stormed out the back door.

Sharon paused by Quil.

He looked up at her, spoon halfway to his mouth.

Sharon gestured to the door.

"What I can't even finish my cereal?" He asked in a pathetic voice.

Sharon rolled her eyes. "You know the new rule. You two are not allowed to be in the house alone."

Quil sighed. "Can I take the bowl with me?"

Sharon narrowed her eyes. "Can I trust you for an hour and a half? The amount of time it takes me to drive Grace to the soccer field and stop at the post office?"

Quil nodded. "She's pissed at me right now anyway, so it shouldn't be a problem."

"Dance again?"

"Yep."

"Wow, you're being pretty stubborn."

From outside Grace began honking the car's horn.

"I have to go." Sharon started to walk out the door. She paused and leaned back in. "I don't care if she's pissed or not. I'll be back in an hour and a half."

Quil waved his hand at her. "I got it, I got it."

After he finished his cereal, rinsed his bowl and put it in the sink, Quil walked back into the living room. He could hear music coming from Claire's room, something slow and depressing sounding.

His shoulders slumped and he sighed. He knew he wouldn't be able to leave with Claire mad at him so he dragged himself up the stairs to Claire's room.

"Claire?" He knocked on her door.

"GO AWAY!" She shouted.

Quil knocked again, a little louder.

"I SAID GO AWAY!"

"I'm not going away until you talk to me," Quil informed her.

He heard Claire climb off her bed and stomp to the door. She pulled it open a crack and glared out at him. "I'm not going to talk to you because I'm mad at you and I'm going to be mad at you forever!" She snapped.

Quil made a face. "Not that long ago you told me you _couldn't_ stay mad at me," he reminded her.

"Well that was before you really pissed me off." She glared at him.

"Come on Claire bear talk to me."

Claire frowned, but then opened the door wide enough for Quil to slip into the room. She closed it behind him, then flounced back over to her bed and dropped onto it.

Quil tried to hide his grin at her theatrics, stepped around a few piles of clothes and sat on the end of her bed.

"I'm sorry, okay? I know this means a lot to you."

"Well if you know it means a lot why are you being so mean?"

"I'm not being mean, I'm being practical. I just don't think it's a good idea for me to go to a dance at your school."

"I wish you'd change your mind," she whispered. "Please?"

Quil closed his eyes. He knew he wasn't going to win on this one. She just had to look at him with those big brown weepy eyes and he was a goner. _God Embry was right_. "Look. I will really think about it, okay? I promise you I will really think about it."

"For real?" Claire looked up at him hopefully. "You're not just saying that so I forgive you?"

Quil shook his head. "No I'm not just saying that. In fact," he took a deep breath. "Why don't you have Sharon buy you a dress."

Claire sat up and squealed. "SERIOUSLY?!"

"Yeah, seriously," Quil grumbled.

"Oh my God, I love you!" She threw her arms around Quil's neck and gave a happy bounce on the bed.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," she crowed and peppered his face with kisses.

"You're welcome. However I have one condition."

"What's that?"

"That you'll at least consider the cheerleading thing. Okay? For me?"

Claire sighed. "I'll consider it. For you." Then with another happy squeal Claire jumped off the bed and gave a twirl.

"Claire I'm serious about the cheerleading thing."

"I hear you, I'm totally going to consider it," she said as she gave another happy spin.

Quil watched as her little skirt puffed out. "Claire can I ask you something?"

Claire stopped mid twirl and looked over. "Sure."

Quil cleared his throat. "Umm, how come…you know lately, how come you're always wearing skirts? I mean it's pretty cold out, but yet you keep wearing these…..little tiny…skirts."

Claire raised her eyebrows. "Do you really want to know?" She asked him coyly.

Quil nodded.

"I wear them for you."

Quil raised his eyes from where they had been studying her legs to give her a surprised look. "Me?"

"Yeah." Claire walked over and stood in front of Quil. "I wore one on the first day of school this year. And I saw you look at me for the first time as more than just a little girl. I really liked how that made me feel. So I wore another one and I got the same look. So I told myself if that's what gets him to look at me, then that's what I'm going to wear."

Quil swallowed hard. "Oh," he said in a little voice.

Claire nodded. "Yeah…oh." She leaned over and put her hands on Quil's knees, pushing his legs apart so she could stand between them.

"Claire, we can't do this, I promised your mom," Quil protested, but he was already pulling her closer.

"She's not here," Claire whispered.

"Exactly and this is….this is against the rules." Quil muttered as Claire climbed onto his lap.

"Screw the rules," she said pressing her lips to his.

Quil nodded. "Okay," he mumbled into her mouth.

* * *

"Claire, stop." Quil grabbed Claire's hands from where they were fumbling with the button on his jeans and sat up on her bed. He could kick himself. Sharon had trusted him and he had broken that trust _again_.

Claire sighed. "What?" She rolled off Quil and moved to the bottom of the bed. "What now?"

"We just, we need to slow down. In fact we need to come to a screeching halt."

Claire frowned. "Why? I mean what's the problem? Is it-"

Quil held up his hand. "No….just no. We're not going to play the 'is it me' game again, okay? Not again."

Claire nodded. After a pause she said, "But is it me?"

Quil scrubbed his face with his hands and groaned. "No, it's not you. It's me. I can't keep doing this."

"Why not? Do you not find me sexy? Am I not hot enough?"

"Claire, the problem isn't you not being sexy….the problem is me _finding_ you sexy. It's just all a little much, okay? I mean Jesus we just talked about this yesterday and yet here I am again. Doing things I should not be doing again. Breaking your mother's trust _again_. That and it's just….it's wrong."

Claire gave a haughty sniff. "You know, you need a new excuse. I'm getting really sick of hearing the 'it's wrong' thing."

Quil sighed. "Then stop giving me a reason to say it," he muttered.

"You know, you keep saying you're not a prude, but anytime things start getting intense, you back off like I'm on fire."

Quil sighed. "See? This is why I never should have started this in the first place." He said quietly.

Claire glared. "Start what?" She spat.

"This!" Quil waved his arm between the two of them. "Us."

"Well I'm so sorry I forced you into this disgusting relationship. I'm sorry that the thought of me repulses you." Claire snapped.

"Oh my God!" Quil moaned and dropped back onto Claire's pillows. "You don't repulse me."

"Then stop acting like I do!"

Quil threw his arms over his eyes. "I'm sorry if I make you feel that way. I don't mean too. I'm just scared."

"Scared? Scared of what?" Claire asked.

"Scared because…..because you turn me on more than any woman ever has. Scared because when I'm with you all I can think about is having you. And I shouldn't, I shouldn't think those things. I shouldn't feel those things."

"Quil," Claire said quietly. "You don't have to be scared of me."

Quil didn't reply. Hey just lay, eyes closed, breathing deeply. After a moment, he prepared himself to get up, to tell Claire he had to leave. If Sharon were to come back early, she'd probably never let him in the house again. Hell she'd probably never let him see Claire again. He was going to say all those things but that was when he felt Claire crawl back up the bed towards him. He sat up like a shot when Claire straddled his thigh.

"Quil," she said, her tone lusty. "Do you think about me when you touch yourself?"

Quil's eyes widened. He tried to say something, anything, but he couldn't remember how to speak.

"Do you?" She asked again.

Numbly, Quil nodded.

"Good," Claire whispered. "Because I think about you."

"Think about me what?" Quil asked dumbly.

"When I touch myself. I think about you."

"Oh God," Quil moaned.

"And when I have an orgasm, I say your name."

Quil closed his eyes. His pulse was racing, his heart drumming so hard in his chest he thought it might burst.

Claire reached forward and took his hand. Quil opened his eyes and stared at her. He watched, frozen as she put his hand under her skirt, between her legs, pressing herself against it.

"Claire," he managed to croak.

"Shh, don't say anything," Claire whispered. She slowly began to rock on his hand.

Quil couldn't breathe. He could feel her heat, feel how aroused she was. All the blood in his body rushed to his groin and he groaned from the suddenness of it.

Claire's eyes were closed, her head tipped forward as she moved against Quil's hand. She was letting out little sighs every few seconds.

Quil was on sensory overload. The feel of her on his hand, the painful erection straining in his pants, those little sighs…it was all too much. His mind was screaming at him to stop this now. Before it got any more out of control, before he couldn't take it back. But that was when Claire quietly moaned his name. At that moment his brain disconnected from his body. His fingers pushed her panties aside, and then he was touching her, his fingers sliding inside of her.

Claire moaned again and reached forward grabbing fistfuls of his tee shirt, moving her hips faster, pushing against his hand more insistently.

Quil's eyes stayed frozen on her face, his mind blank as he moved his hand faster, his thumb brushing against her swollen bundle of nerves. Claire gasped his name, squeezed her thighs hard around his hand, and after a moment collapsed forward onto his chest. She panted against him, her hands still holding his shirt in weak fists. Quil remained frozen, his eyes staring straight ahead, his face blank.

Claire slowly sat up, removing her hands from his shirt, the spots where she had been grabbing standing out in wrinkled bunches. "Quil?" She said softly. When he didn't respond she took his shoulders and shook him. "Quil!" She said louder.

Quil eye's suddenly met hers and he pulled her to him, latching his lips on hers. His kiss was rough and desperate and left her gasping for air.

Quil broke the kiss and pressed his face into her neck. "Claire, God please….I hurt," he moaned.

Claire nodded her understanding. She reached down and released him from his pants. He was so sensitized that it only took a few strokes from her hand before he grunted and climaxed.

They sat for a moment, both breathing heavily. Suddenly Quil's brain crashed back into his head and he jerked away from Claire, his eyes wide with horror. "Oh God, Oh God, Oh God," he moaned.

Claire shook her head, "Quil don't," she whispered. "Don't do this."

"I have to go, this…I have to go," Quil extricated himself from Claire's reaching hands and stood up. With disgust, he stuffed himself back into his jeans and jerked his fly up.

"Quil," Claire pleaded. "Please don't go. Let's talk about this. Just stop freaking out okay?"

"No, I can't…we can't talk about this. I have to go. I've got to get out of here."

"Quil this is not that big of a deal. Just calm down!"

Quil stared at Claire. "Not that big a deal? Hello? Is Claire in there? I mean she looks like Claire and she sounds like Claire, but the Claire I know wouldn't do this to me!"

"Do what? What am I doing to you? Just talk to me!"

Quil shook his head, his lips pressed into a hard white line. He grabbed his shoes off the floor and fled from the room.

"Quil!"

He heard Claire shout his name, but he didn't stop. He raced from her house, tugging his shoes on as he went.


	9. Breakdown

**Chapter Title taken from the song "Breakdown" by Breaking Benjamin.**

* * *

Quil stumbled home, his mind awash with guilt. _I never should have let it get that far, God I'm an idiot_, he chastised himself. He kicked at the loose gravel on the side of the road in frustration. He had to put a stop to this now. There was no if ands or buts about it. It was getting too intense, going to far. Kissing was one thing, but this? This was so far beyond the realm of what was appropriate that he could barely wrap his mind around it. He slammed into his house and stormed down to his bedroom. He had to shower, he could smell Claire all over himself. The worst part of it was, deep, deep down inside, he was pleased and some what still aroused by her scent. He would take two showers. Just to be sure. He ripped his clothes off and grabbed his ratty sweats. He turned to leave the room when suddenly every hair on the back of his neck stood up. The breeze floated through his open window, and he instinctively sniffed deeply. Suddenly all thoughts of Claire were pushed to the back recesses of his mind. _Vampire_.

Quil raced out of his room, down the hallway and threw the door of the house open. Oh yeah, vampire all right. God, how had he not noticed it before? The scent was strong….and close. He ran into the woods behind his house and taking a deep breath, he phased. He sniffed again. The bloodsuckers trail was leading into the mountains.

_Anyone here?_

No response. Wasn't anyone on patrol today? He knew that patrol had been uneventful the last few months, but where was everyone? The wind kicked up again and the sickening smell of the vampire flooded his nose. Quil's heart pounded with adrenaline. His mouth filled with saliva that dripped from his muzzle in ropey runners. He threw his head back and howled.

Almost immediately he wasn't alone.

_It's heading north_, Collin said. _I've got the trail over here_.

_Did I miss the party_? Leah's voice joined in.

_Think it's the Cullen's?_ Brady asked.

_No, Jake would have said if they were coming back with him and Nessie. _Quil sniffed again_. Besides this smells nothing like them_.

Jake and Nessie were in Juneau visiting Nessie's parents. They weren't due back for at least another week.

_Everyone listen up. Brady, Collin and Leah you head northwest. Quil and Embry you come with me north east. We'll cut the leech off at the point and block any escape. Divide and conquer _Sam spoke up.

Sam's voice caused Quil to take pause. _Oh God I can't think about what just happened._

_What just happened? _

_Ummm…..I'm a little teapot short and stout. Here is my handle here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout. Tip me over and pour me out. I'm a little teapot short and stout….try that mothballs thing of Seth's. _Suddenly Quil's mind was filled with the images of his and Seth's conversation from a few nights ago.

_OH MY GOD! I really did NOT need to know that about my brother!_

_SHIT! I'm a little teapot short and stout. Here is my handle here is my spout…._

_Sam can I have your permission to kill him? _Brady piped up. _Not only did I not need to know that little tidbit, but if he keeps singing that song I'm going to lose my mind._

_Get in line Brady, I have first dibs. _Leah snarled.

_Nobody's killing anyone. But Quil, I swear to God if you don't stop singing, I might change my mind._

_Hey sorry I'm late. Did I miss anything? _Seth's voice entered their minds.

_Check it out, Mothballs decided to show up. _Embry snickered.

_EMBRY!_

_Hey it wasn't me! Talk to your buddy Quil over there._

_God Damn it Quil! I told you to guard that with your life!_

_Sorry, it slipped out during verses of I'm A Little Teapot._

_You're an ass. That's the last time I ever try to help you out._

_Well it didn't help anyway! God the look on Claire's face when she cam…ptown races sing this song do dah do dah. Camptown races five miles long oh dah do dah day._

The snarling behind Quil was so loud, a surprised yelp burst from his throat.

_What did you just say?_

_Ummm…oh dah do dah day?_

_Not that. _

_I don't know what you mean._

_You know what I mean. What the hell did you do?_

_I didn't do anything! _

Sam ran up beside Quil and sniffed deeply. _I can smell Claire all over you_!

_It's nothing, nothing happened_. Quil's protest meant nothing. He tried to stop it, but the images of his morning with Claire flooded his mind. He mentally winced.

_Holy shit! _Brady shouted.

_Ugh, _Leah groaned_. Quil you're killing me today._

_Quil, stop right now._

_But we're on a mission. I mean the vamp is going to get away._

_NOW! _Sam's voice rang in Quil's head_._

Quil skidded to a halt. In front of him Sam slid to a stop and turned to stare at Quil.

_You are going to phase. You are going to get the hell out of my sight._

_Sam, I…_

_Quil, right now you are lucky I'm in control of myself enough to not kill you._

_Sam this is ridiculous. I mean you're going to punish me now? In the middle of a hunt? Come on._

_Quil, phase and go back to my house and wait. That's an order._

Sam let out a low growl. _The walk will do you good._

Quil shook his great head once in disgust. He concentrated on phasing, ripped his sweatpants off his leg, threw them on, and began his long walk back.

* * *

"Quil? What are you doing back?"

Emily and Kim were in the kitchen when Quil stormed into the house.

"Sam made me leave," Quil growled. He slumped into one of the kitchen chairs and sighed. He noticed the two women looking at him strangely. "What?" he snapped.

Emily made a face. "Nothing, just….he must be pretty upset." She said slowly. "To make you come back."

"Well I don't care. I mean this is ridiculous. They're out there hunting the vampire I found and I'm stuck in the kitchen with you chicks yakking."

"Hey, can the attitude." Emily frowned.

Quil sighed again. "Sorry. I just….I think Sam is going to kill me."

"Why would Sam want to kill you?" Kim looked at Quil, confused.

"Because he you know….saw something in my head that pissed him off." Quil muttered.

Emily raised her eyebrows. "Really?"

"Yeah and it wasn't even my fault. I was an innocent bystander in the whole you know….thing." Quil waved his arms helplessly.

Emily licked her lips. "_Really_." She said again.

Quil groaned. "No." He stood up and began pacing around the small kitchen.

Emily and Kim jumped out of his way.

"This is so insane. I mean, what business is it of his anyway? He doesn't own me, I'm my own man. I don't care what he thinks. I don't care what _any_ of you think." He stabbed his finger in the direction of the women. "I mean, I can do whatever I want. He's not my boss."

"Well technically-" Emily began but Quil cut her off.

"I mean I made one mistake." Quil's voice began to rise in pitch, panic setting in. "I'm almost positive it won't ever happen again. And if it does, who cares? I don't care. I DON'T CARE! Oh God, I do care!" Quil collapsed into the kitchen chair again and buried his head in his arms.

"I really do think he might kill me," Quil muttered. "And if he doesn't, then Sharon will. I've totally betrayed everyone's trust. I'm a horrible person."

Emily gave a pointed look to Kim. Kim nodded and left the kitchen.

Emily sat in the chair next to Quil and scrutinized him. "What happened?"

"I am _not_ talking about this with you." Quil said, disgusted.

"Look, you have five minutes to convince me to talk to Sam when he get's back. Start talking."

Quil looked up, his eyes swimming with tears. "Something happened with me and Claire," he whispered.

"I gathered," Emily said quietly.

"I wanted to stop, I did, but then I didn't want to stop and then it was just happening and then it was too late to even think about stopping, and even if I had tried to stop it, I had no control over my body, like I was just frozen. Like my brain just disconnected from my body. I was brainless. I had _no_ brain. Well I had a brain but it wasn't in my head." Quil's words tumbled out in a rushed jumble.

Emily sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Quil please tell me you didn't sleep with my niece."

Quil shook his head. "No, we didn't sleep together but…..it was still pretty bad."

"Quil, you have got to stop this. Now."

Quil took a shuddering breath. "I know," he said quietly. "I just don't know how. I mean I want to stop. My mind screams stop, but my body and God, my heart. They don't want to stop. I love her. And worse, I want her."

"Maybe you should just take a step back you know? Take a break. Not see her for a little while."

Quil's eyes widened and he shook his head vehemently. "I can't do that, I can't be apart from her. It would kill me. I can't….no. Even if I could Claire wouldn't stand for it. Could you stay away from Sam? It's not fair to even ask me that."

"Quil, you have to do something. You can't keep going on like this. You need to be the responsible one and if you can't do that, well…..then maybe you need to go away for a little while."

Quil shook his head again. "No." He said stubbornly.

"Then you need to grow up. Now. Get control of yourself. You're not a boy anymore, you're a man. You have got to start acting like one." Emily sighed. "Go home. I'll talk to Sam. But I'm serious Quil. You _need_ to stop this."

Quil swiped angrily at the tears leaking from his eyes. "I know," he whispered hoarsely.

He stood up and dragged himself from Sam and Emily's. His brain was on overload, totally fried. He couldn't string two thoughts together. He knew he didn't want to go home, so blindly, he let his feet lead the way.

* * *

"Hey there sug-" Haley's greeting died on her lips. "Jesus," She said softly. "Um, you a, you want a beer?" She tried to recover.

Quil slumped onto a bar stool. "Sure," he muttered.

Haley grabbed a beer, set it in front of Quil and then leaned on the bar in front of him. "You know we have a no shirt, no shoes, no service policy," she said.

Quil looked down at himself. His feet and legs were mud caked and spatters of mud streaked his chest. "Hmm, I forgot I guess," he said.

Haley nodded her head. "Yeah I guess I can see how you could forget." She paused. "Except that I can't. What in the hell were you doing?"

Quil just shrugged and chugged his beer. "Running," he grunted.

"Barefoot?"

"Obviously."

Haley raised her eyebrows. "Not very talkative today, huh? Okay. Don't worry, I'll get you all liquored up and you'll be spilling your guts in no time."

"Good luck with that," Quil muttered.

"Snotty too," Haley said. "Ohh this is going to be fun." She rubbed her hands together and smiled. "I love a challenge."

* * *

Three hours several beers and a few Southern Comforts later, Quil leaned forward on the bar and motioned Haley over.

"Ready to talk, if you're even capable of speech right now?" She asked him.

"I'm fine," Quil informed her.

"Well you're a big guy, but you've put away quite a few."

Quil waved his hand in a negative gesture and made a face. "I'm totally okay," he said. "So you ready to hear my problem? Give me some of that Trudoe advice?"

"Sure thing sugar. I'm all ears."

Quil sighed. "Okay. You remember when we were…..together?"

Haley rolled her eyes. "Quil we used to sleep together. Sex does not a relationship make."

"Well…whatever. Remember how I told you I couldn't do it anymore because my heart belonged to someone else?"

"Of course I remember. I was pretty pissed about losing the best sex I'd ever had….at that point," she said with a wink.

"Well the girl, the one who has my heart? She's a little…..young."

Haley frowned. "What do you mean? I mean you're twenty….what? How old _are_ you? You know it's weird but seriously, I don't think you have changed one iota since I've met you."

"Technically, I'm twenty-eight. Listen, before I say anything else you have to promise to not freak out or you know, judge me or anything okay? Can you promise me that?"

"Well I'm going to try, but with that kind of statement you're sort of setting yourself up, don't you think?"

"Just hear me out. Okay so this girl, she's young. Like a lot younger than me."

"Quil I've known you ten years and you've been telling me about this girl for almost that same amount of time. I mean you tend to be private about it, but whenever you would off handedly mention her, you'd light up like a little sparkler. So I mean….how much younger than you can she be?"

Quil sighed. "Okay, this is the part where you can't freak out."

"Okay.." Haley said slowly.

Quil leaned even closer and whispered. "She's fourteen."

"WHAT?!"

"You said you weren't going to freak out!"

"Yeah but Quil, I mean Jesus," Haley breathed. "You have been talking about this girl for ten years. TEN YEARS! That means she was like….eww God four-years-old when you and I met." Haley backed up a few steps a look of disgust on her face.

"It's not like that, it's not what you think," Quil protested.

"Well then, umm, Quil what is it like? 'Cause no offense, I _am_ a little freaked out and quite frankly disgusted by this whole conversation right now."

"Okay, look. When I was sixteen, I was sort of….promised to this girl, or she was promised to me, however you want to look at it."

"What the hell, did this reservation turn Hindu when I wasn't looking?"

"No, no it's…..it's not like an arranged marriage. Just, okay this is going to sound really crazy.."

"This whole thing is crazy," Haley said.

"When I saw Claire for the first time……I knew she was my soul mate. Don't ask me how, I just, I did. And I did not think of her in a sexual way….at all. I mean AT ALL. I was like a nanny slash big brother, you know? I mean that's what our relationship was."

"Was?"

"Well like I said, she's fourteen now. And she's…..she thinks she's ready for more of a relationship."

"More of a relationship? What the hell Quil?"

"Yeah, so you know we've been dating a little. But the problem is she keeps pushing for more. And today, we…..well lets just say got very….friendly."

"Oh my God, do I even want to know what in the hell you are referring to?"

"No, no we didn't…..we didn't sleep together, but uhhh, there was some touching. A lot of touching that you know resulted in…well you know."

Haley had a horrified look on her face. "Quil, I'm sorry but this….this is sick."

"Look….I love her. And she loves me."

"Love? Would you listen to yourself? She is still a child!"

"Okay, I'm trying to explain myself here and you're making it really difficult."

"I'm making it difficult? Quil you're telling me about your sexual activity with a fourteen-year-old girl. You're lucky I haven't called the cops yet."

"Listen God damn it, I'm trying to explain this to you. I'm trying to put the brakes on this and she's the one who keeps pushing and pushing, and the problem is…I love her. She's my soul mate. When she's hurting, I'm hurting. When she's upset I'm upset. And I keep upsetting her, because she wants this so badly and I keep telling her I don't want it, but….I do. I do want it…her."

Haley held up her hands. "Quil, you need to stop like right now. I honestly don't think I can listen to this anymore. I….am just having a hard time looking at you right now without wanting to puke."

And that was when the last tether inside Quil snapped. The one person he thought he could trust, the one person he thought wouldn't judge him, the one person he thought might be able to help him believed he was just as sick and twisted as _he_ thought he was. He felt all the guilt, all the anger, all the disgust, every bad thing he thought about himself bubble up to the surface and explode from every orifice of his body.

"What like you're so much better?" He snapped at her.

"Excuse me?"

"You're a fucking bartender. You've been a fucking bartender for ten years. You still single, probably because you're afraid to have a real relationship."

"This coming from the guy who's dating a fourteen-year-old," Haley snapped.

"At least I have something, something that's real. Whether you believe it or not, Claire loves me. We are going to get married. What do you have? Other than a string of meaningless one night stands?"

"Fuck you Quil! You were one of those meaningless one nights stands, remember. It just lasted two years."

"Yeah who knows how many other guys you were fucking at the same time as me!"

Haley took a deep breath. "Okay you know what. You just need to calm down."

Quil scoffed. "Well if I was a slut like you I guess I could go right ahead and calm down all over the God damn reservation."

Haley shook her head, tears streaming down her face. "You know what? I don't deserve this. I do NOT deserve this. Just get out. Just get the fuck out of my face and out of my bar."

Quil flew up, the bar stool he had been sitting on over turned and skidded across the floor. "FINE." He stormed towards the door.

"Fuck you!" Haley shouted after him.

"Right back at you!" Quil yelled as he punched the door of the bar open, busting it off it's hinges.

He burst onto the street, his entire body trembling. He ran as fast as he could, his bare feet pounding into the ground. He made it a few miles before he slowed. He pulled himself up and bent over, trying to get himself under some sort of control. He took big whooping breaths and slowly his body stopped trembling. He remained bent over, his eyes closed. After a moment he straightened up. He could still feel his anger pulsing all through his body, but he knew now he wasn't going to phase. The sky was overcast and rain was already drizzling down. As he stood not moving, there was a crash of thunder and the sky opened up the rain pouring down, drenching him. Quil turned his face up to the sky and let the rain rush over him, praying it would wash all of his anguish away.

* * *

"Quil thank God you're here. Claire is hysterical. Sam was here…." Sharon trailed off.

Quil stood on the back porch, drenched, mud spattered, eyes wild.

"What the hell happened to you?" Sharon put a hand over her mouth.

"I need to speak to Claire," Quil said slowly, trying to keep his voice under control.

"I…oh…. Quil…I don't…I don't think that's a good idea right now. Maybe you should go home. Come back tomorrow."

Quil shook his head violently from side to side. "I need to see her now."

Sharon backed up a step from the door, fear playing on her face. "Quil I think you need to calm down first. I don't think you should see her like this."

"I want to see him. I need to talk to him," Claire's emotion choked voice said from behind Sharon.

"Claire I don't think this is a good idea." Sharon protested.

"Sharon I'm fine. I've got it under control," Quil said quietly.

"You can talk through the door, okay? I just I don't want you to come in."

Quil shrugged. "Whatever you want Sharon."

"No mom, I'm going out there." Claire pushed past her mother and stepped out onto the porch. She turned back towards the door. "Mom I'm fine, we'll be fine. Please leave us alone a minute."

Hesitantly, Sharon walked away. "Five minutes," she said.

Claire looked up at Quil, her eyes questioning. "Quil," she whispered.

Quil looked at her, through her. "Claire, I can't be with you anymore." He said, his voice breaking.

Claire's eyes widened in shock. "What?" She gasped.

Quil barked out a laugh choked with tears. "I can't do this. I mean I think I'm going insane. I actually think I'm going fucking insane." He laughed again, this one edged with hysteria.

"Quil don't say that. You can't mean that," Claire sobbed.

Quil shook his head. "It has been confirmed that I am in fact a disgusting pervert for being with you, so I don't want to be anymore. I don't want to hate myself like this anymore."

"Quil, this is crazy. I love you and you love me. There is nothing perverted about it!"

"What happened this morning. Yeah, all kinds of bad. I can't let that happen again and the only way to do that is to stop seeing you."

"Stop saying that!" Claire shrieked. She clapped her hands over her ears. "I don't want to hear this!"

Quil grabbed Claire's wrists, wrenching them off her ears. "You need to hear this."

"No, no I won't! I won't listen to it!"

Quil's eyes suddenly hardened. "If you can't handle the big girl situations, you shouldn't get into them….little girl." He spat.

He dropped Claire's wrists and abruptly turned away, walking off the porch.

He heard the thump as Claire dropped to her knees on the porch, crying his name.

It took all his willpower to not turn around. To not go and take it all back. He had to get away, he could feel himself getting ready to fall apart and he didn't want Claire to see that. He needed for her to not see that. He began to run again. When he had made it as far away as he could, he skidded to a stop. For one second he thought he was going to be okay. Then he leaned over and retched. While it was happening he had the flittering thought that is was odd because he hadn't been sick in fourteen years. He didn't think werewolves could get sick. But this wasn't from illness. It was from heartbreak. He actually thought his heart would rip from his chest, shoot up his throat and explode out of his mouth into a bloody pulp all over the ground. When nothing more would come up, he stood and dry heaved, his stomach actually beginning to ache from the effort.

When he was sure the dry heaving was over, he straightened up. His body felt disassociated from it's whole, his legs were rubber, his arms lead. If he could actually pull an individual thought out of his mind it would be a miracle. He suddenly felt numb. His face went slack and blank. Slowly he began a shambling walk, not aware of his surroundings, not aware of anything other than the hollow spot in his chest where his heart had been.

* * *

"Quil, where in the hell have you been? Sam's totally pissed. He's been looking for you everywhere. I figured you were at Ruby's so I told him I'd check over there, but I didn't actually look. I figured you'd want to be alone…." Embry's rambling trailed off. "Quil? Quil?"

Quil stood in the living room, dripping mud and water onto the floor. His eyes were glazed, his face a blank mask.

Embry walked over to him. "Quil? Hey buddy?" He waved his hand in front of Quil's eyes. "SETH! SETH GET IN HERE!"

Seth came jogging down the hallway, cell phone to his ear. "Oh thank God. Jake, he's here, hang on a sec." Seth took the phone away from his ear. "Quil, you okay man?"

Embry looked at Seth, fear in his eyes. He reached forward and tentatively poked Quil on the arm. "Christ I think he's broken," he murmured. "QUIL!" Embry snapped his fingers in front of Quil's eyes.

"Quil?" Seth eyes searched for something, anything in Quil's. He slowly put the phone back up to his ear. "Jake this is bad. Yeah I think you should. Okay. Okay. Yeah. All right I will. Bye." Seth closed his cell phone and looked at Embry. "Jake's coming home. He'll be over as soon as they get back." He looked at Quil again. "Quil, man. Can you say something? Please?"

"Shower." Quil's voice was flat and lifeless.

"What?"

"I need a shower."

Seth nodded. "Okay, yeah good idea. Go take a shower."

Quil nodded his head once up and once down. He slowly shambled down the hallway towards the bathroom.

Seth and Embry exchanged concerned looks. "You know how we always joke…about Quil pulling his freak outs over Claire?" Embry said quietly. "I don't really think it's so funny right now."

Seth nodded. "Yeah. There's nothing funny about this."

They both started when the shower kicked on. "Maybe he'll be better after he showers. Maybe it'll you know, wake him up a little." Seth said hopefully.

"I sure as hell hope so. I mean…..he looks pretty out of it. Think we should call Sam?"

Seth shook his head. "No. Let's wait for Jake."

"Okay," Embry took a deep shuddering breath. "Okay."

* * *

Quil stood in the shower, the hot water pouring over his body. He felt totally numb. He wondered if this was what it was like to be crazy. Maybe they would have him committed. He wondered what it would be like to spend the rest of his life in a loony bin. He briefly imagined white rooms with padded walls, his large arms strapped behind his back in a straight jacket. Then he realized that if he was crazy, really crazy, he probably wouldn't be aware that he was crazy. It probably didn't work that way. He suddenly cackled out an hysterical laugh. Imagine a crazy person who knew he was crazy. His laugh cut off into a choked sob.

That one sob was what did it. Everything that had happened rushed back in. One minute he was living in the furthest corner of his mind, content to feel nothing. The next he was on his knees in the shower his entire body shaking from the sobs being wrenched out of him. He didn't know how long he cried, other than to register that the water in the shower went from hot to luke warm to cool to icy. When the sobbing died down, he sat on the floor of the shower, his knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around them, rocking.

* * *

"Maybe we should just you know….leave him alone." Seth said, worry etched in his voice. "I mean Jake will be here in a few hours."

Embry shook his head. "He's been in that shower for almost two hours. Maybe he drowned. I think we should go in."

"He drowned? In a shower? Don't be a total moron."

Embry looked indignant. "Well at the very least he's probably pretty pruned. We should get him out of there."

"I think we should leave him."

"Well I don't care what you think. He can't stay in the shower all night! I mean, I know he's lost it, but it's not healthy."

They both jumped back from the door when they heard the shower turn off.

"Okay, see this is good. He's going to come out on his own. He's going to be fine." Seth gave a forced smile.

"Dude, I really don't think he's going to be fine," Embry said. "I mean did you see his face? It was vacant. Like there was some big neon vacancy sign flashing on his forehead. It was totally creepy."

"No, he's going to be fine!" Seth insisted.

"I am going to be fine," Quil said, opening the door.

Seth and Embry both started and then laughed uncomfortably. "Of course you are," Embry placated.

Quil gave a short bark of laughter. "Yeah I mean I'm not going to do what you think I'm going to do which is totally you know like FREAK OUT!" He waved his arms spastically in the air. "No, I'm going to be just fine. Just fine. I mean, I don't even like white rooms that much."

Embry and Seth exchanged nervous glances. "What's that buddy?" Seth asked quietly.

Quil shook his head. "Besides I'd totally be able to bust out of that jacket. I mean I'd just phase and bam, you know….buckles everywhere." He gave a maniacal giggle.

"Whoa," Embry breathed.

"Hey, umm, Quil?" Seth spoke softly. "Jake's coming over to see you, okay?"

Quil gave Seth a huge toothy grin. "My buddy Jake? Awesome." He glanced down at his naked form. "Guess I should get some clothes on huh?" He turned and marched purposefully to his bedroom.

"Okay, screw Jake, I think we need to call a psychiatrist….like immediately," Embry whispered.

"Just…..God. I don't even know what in the hell to do right now." Seth whispered back.

Before Embry could reply, Quil strolled out of his room dressed in baggy jeans and a black tee shirt. Embry and Seth pressed themselves up against the wall as Quil ambled past them to the kitchen. They stood in the hallway looking at each other until they heard Quil in the kitchen.

"What the hell is this?" He shouted.

Seth pushed Embry towards the kitchen.

"I'm not going in there! Did you see his eyes? They're all crazy." Embry hissed.

"Just get in there!"

They both walked towards the kitchen, Seth poking Embry in the back when he stopped at the end of the hallway. Embry threw a dirty look at Seth over his shoulder and slowly stepped into the kitchen.

"Umm what's up?" Seth asked.

"We have no beer," Quil said. He was standing in front of the open refrigerator door. "I'm outraged. I am now outraged. I can't have Jake come over to hang out and not have any beer. What kind of host would that make me? Which one of you drank it all?"

"He did!" Seth and Embry said at the same time, each one pointing at the other.

Quil shook his head. "Well, no matter. I'll just go get some more." He closed the fridge door and walked towards the front door.

"Whoa, whoa," Seth jumped in front of Quil. "I don't think Jake's going to mind that we don't have beer, man. Why don't you just hang out with us. You know here. In the living room." Seth glanced around wildly. "We can watch a movie!" He pointed out the DVDs.

"Yeah, yeah," Embry joined Seth. "We can just hang out till Jake gets here."

Quil frowned and looked at them both.

Embry's eyes widened when he saw the look Quil was giving them. "Oh God, Oh God," he muttered. He backed out of Quil's way slowly, put his hand up to shield his face and hissed to Seth, "Do not engage in eye contact, do not engage in eye contact."

"I'm going……to get…..some beer." Quil said slowly.

"Quil, I really think you should just-"

"I'M GOING TO GET SOME BEER!"

Seth jumped. "Okay, okay," he moved out of Quil's way.

"Thanks. Okay great I'll be right back." Quil smiled at them both and made his way out of the house.

Once he had left, Seth and Embry both collapsed onto chairs. "Holy shit," Embry muttered. "That was ten kinds of crazy."

Seth nodded. "For once, I agree with you."

* * *

The moment he walked out of the house, Quil entirely forgot where he meant to go. He stood at the end of the driveway for a moment thinking, but it just wouldn't come to him. It was still drizzling slightly as he slowly walked down the road. Since he couldn't remember where he was going, he decided to just walk until he ended up somewhere. Maybe then he would remember. After a while of aimless walking, Quil was surprised to find himself at the cliffs. Had he meant to come there? He didn't really know. He walked along the trail to the highest cliff and stood at the edge. He wondered why he felt like he was drowning. He was on dry land after all. It was a strange feeling really. To feel the water filling your lungs, limbs floating, vision blurry. He held his arms out to his sides and let the rain pelt him. The wind was stronger up here and it rippled his soaked shirt like a flag. He turned his head to the sky and closed his eyes. The drowning feeling got heavier. He thought maybe the only way to make it go away was to reverse the sensation. Maybe he wouldn't feel like he was drowning on land if he was in the water. Quil yelled at the top of his lungs, a guttural primitive noise, no words. Without opening his eyes he took a few steps back, then pushed forward and jumped.

A/N: Hey guys, don't worry if Quil pisses you off in this chapter. He just needed a good mental breakdown. I have it on good authority that he'll snap out of it very soon!


	10. Anger As Beauty

**Chapter title taken from the song "Anger As Beauty" by Hawksley Workman**

* * *

Quil woke to the feeling of someone jabbing the toe of their shoe into his ribs. He groaned and opened his eyes, squinting against the light. He found himself looking up into Haley's un-amused face.

"You need to move. I have to open the door." She said coldly.

Quil struggled to his feet. "Sorry," he croaked.

Haley eyed him for a moment. She then took her keys and opened the back door of Ruby's. She held the door open and motioned him inside.

"You want something? Coffee?" Haley asked as she put her coat and purse down on the bar.

"Juice would be good thanks."

As Haley went behind the bar to pour the juice, Quil sat at one of the tables and glanced at the clock on the wall. "What are you doing here so early?" He asked.

Haley came over with two glasses of Orange Juice. She set one of the glasses in front of Quil and took the other, sitting across from him. "I'm doing inventory." She told him.

They sat in silence for a moment. Then Haley said, "So you look like you've been on a real bender."

"It was more of a complete mental breakdown," Quil informed her. He shrugged and took a sip of juice. "It was okay. Everybody should have one."

Haley didn't answer him. She sipped her juice and sighed.

"Look," Quil started. "I'm really sorry about last night. I don't know what in the hell I was thinking. I said horrible things. Untrue things. And you were right you deserve better than that."

Haley nodded. "I'm glad you agree." She sighed. "I'm sorry too. I mean I could have handled the whole situation a lot better. You asked me not to judge you and I did. I'm sorry for not being a very good friend."

Quil shrugged again. "It's okay. It's a crazy situation. I know how it sounds."

Haley made a face. "Well honestly….not good."

"I realize that," he said. He looked down and absently picked at the edge of the table.

Haley eyed him. "So what the hell _did _you do last night?"

"Jumped off the peak."

Haley's eyes widened. "You did what now?"

"Jumped off the peak. It was actually very enlightening."

"You know, when you told me you went cliff diving I always thought it was off, you know….the low ones. You jumped off the very top?"

Quil nodded.

"You know you're insane right?"

"I actually feel more sane now than I did yesterday."

Haley sighed. "Look Quil, about yesterday. You're a good guy. I know that for a fact. I should have been more understanding. I'm willing to be that now. That is if you still want to talk about it."

Quil shook his head. "It's……complicated. I can't tell you everything. I can't explain the whole thing. Not because I don't want to but because I'm not allowed."

Haley made a face. "Not allowed?"

"No. I'm sort of bound. By an order from my….tribe. I can't talk about it. The only thing I really can tell you is that I'm not going around looking at little girls or anything. In fact I don't even see other girls. I only see Claire."

"Look, Quil. I don't know if I'll ever fully understand your relationship with this girl. I mean you'd come in here, I'd ask about your day, and the first thing you would say would be 'well I hung out with Claire'. I'd ask what you guys did and you'd never really answer. 'We just hung out.' That's all I'd ever get out of you. I always thought it was sweet because…..I mean Quil you should see how you look when you talk about her. My God, your…..your whole face lights up and you get this stupid goofy grin. I mean Jesus, your fucking eyes even sparkle. I don't think you even realize it."

Quil leaned back and closed his eyes. "She's my soul mate. I mean she is my whole world. _My whole world_. I think of nothing but her pretty much every minute of every day. Even when you and I were together…..and I beg you to not take this personally, but for me, we were just physical. I never had you know….feelings like that for you."

Haley gave him a small smile. "I knew that back then. I mean, I used to imagine that you would change your mind but…you never did."

"It wasn't because of you, I don't want you to think that. It was because of Claire. She was four when I met you and six when we stopped hooking up and that whole time I felt guilty. I mean in my mind I was betraying her, even though, back then at least, I thought of her as a little sister. But now everything has changed. Haley, I've always loved Claire, from the minute I saw her, but now…now I'm _in_ love with her." Quil gave Haley a small smile. "But the thing I can't get out of my mind is how wrong it is for me to feel this way about her. I sort of made a deal with myself and her parents that I wouldn't have a relationship with Claire until she was sixteen. Claire has other ideas though. She wants us to have a relationship now. And the worst part of it is that I want that too. But she's young."

Haley frowned. "Her parents _know_ about your relationship?"

Quil nodded. He sat forward and picked absently at his fingernails as he spoke. "It's part of the thing I can't talk about. But yes, they knew when I met Claire that we were meant to be together. They've always been really supportive of my relationship with Claire. I mean there are ground rules they made twelve years ago, one of which was that Claire and I couldn't have a romantic relationship until she was sixteen. And I was totally fine with that. But lately…….it's been hard to stick to the rules. Then they relented and said we could start dating so long as it was supervised and we didn't get physical."

Quil took a deep breath. "But it _has _gotten physical. The thing is….recently when it comes to Claire, I built up this whole like, wall, you know? This wall to hide all the bad things I was thinking and feeling. Things I knew I shouldn't be thinking and feeling for her. But then Claire takes this fucking sledgehammer and knocks the whole damn thing down. And it scares the hell out of me. It scares me to feel this much. I feel like, when I'm with her….I have no control. Over anything. And I don't just mean, you know, like sex stuff. I mean _everything_. I feel so much for her, not only love, you know? I ache in my chest for her. I actually physically ache. It's like I have no room inside of me for all this emotion. I kept trying to push it down and push it down and then last night I couldn't push it down anymore and it just bubbled up and fucking exploded like a damn geyser all over her."

Quil leaned back and sighed. "I really fucked things up. I pushed her away because of my own fears. I don't think I can fix this. I told her I didn't want to see her anymore. But it's not true. God, it's not even remotely true. I flipped out and hurt her really badly. I am a horrible person."

Haley shook her head vehemently. "You are not a horrible person. Quil I know I freaked out about this yesterday, and I still can't say that I totally…..agree with the situation. I mean you're twenty-eight and she's fourteen. But my God if she feels half of what you feel for her? Well something like that is rare. It's worth fighting for."

"I can't," Quil took a shuddering breath. "Sharon and Sam will never agree. It doesn't even matter what I want. I'm not going to be allowed to have it."

"Who is Sharon? And why does Sam have _anything_ to do with your relationship?"

"Sharon is Claire's mom. I mean she's been pretty understanding about this whole thing…she knows that Claire is the one who's been pushing for more, but Sam…Claire is Sam's niece and for twelve years now he's been dictating to me how I need to act with her. There is no way that either of them will even consider letting us have a real relationship now. I mean Sam was pissed that we were just dating. No…" Quil shook his head sadly. "We can't be together. Not now, and after all this…maybe not ever."

Haley gave him a sympathetic look. "You can always talk to them. I mean what else have you got to lose?"

Quil shrugged. "I don't know, my dignity, my pride….possibly my manhood….literally. Sam would probably castrate me for even bringing it up." He shook his head again. "No, it's not going to happen. And they would be right because it shouldn't happen. I just have to accept that." Quil sighed and stood up. "Thanks for listening. I really needed someone to talk to, you know?"

Haley nodded. "Anytime. I promise to always be open minded, no matter what. Well unless you kill someone. Then I might have to reconsider. Okay?"

"Okay." Quil gave her a half hearted smile. "I better go. And I really am sorry about yesterday."

Haley stood up and pulled Quil into a hug. "It's fine, Quil. I really hope everything works out for you."

Quil nodded but didn't say anything. The thought that he might have to go the rest of his life without Claire was sinking in and he feared if he spoke, it would cause what little sanity he had gained to slip away again. He just hugged Haley back and tried desperately to hold on.

* * *

Quil walked slowly home, his mind a blur. The more he walked the more he thought about a life without Claire. He couldn't even begin to comprehend how hard that would be. He tried to grab hold of something, anything in his head that might begin to rid him of this pain, but even when something would jump forward, he couldn't grip it long enough before it dissolved back into the blur. As he approached his house, praying Seth and Embry weren't home - God he couldn't deal with Frick and Frak today- he was jolted when he saw not only Seth and Embry's cars there, but Jacob's as well, the black Lexus parked at a haphazard angle.

He thought he vaguely remembered Seth mentioning Jake last night, though now he couldn't pull out the reason why. Suddenly it hit him. Jacob had come to see him. Quil closed his eyes. He did not need this now. He just needed to be alone. He needed to lay down and be depressed. He couldn't lay down and be depressed with three annoying wolves hanging over his shoulders.

As quietly as possible, Quil snuck around the back of the house and climbed in through his bedroom window. Once in the room he held his breath for a moment, waiting to see if any of them had heard him come in. When he was satisfied that they hadn't, he climbed into his bed, pulling the covers over his head. He could hear Seth, Embry and Jacob in the living room, talking about him. About how he had lost it, how they didn't know what to do, about where he might be. He groaned softly and buried his head under his pillow, trying to drown them out. All he wanted right now was to stay in bed until he either died of heartbreak or starvation. Probably starvation first, he figured. Heartbreak was too cruel to kill him quickly. It would only fester inside of him like an infected sore, making him just miserable enough to want to die, but not being kind enough to kill him outright. He was ready to let the depression completely take over when suddenly his bedroom door flew open, the door frame splintering with a loud crack.

Quil sat up and looked at the ruined door frame and then into the dark, worried eyes of Jacob Black.

"That's the second time you've murdered my door," he muttered.

"Where the hell have you been?" Jacob's voice was tight with anger.

"Out."

"Oh out, oh well okay then. That makes everything okay. Great, you were out." Jacob glared at him.

"Well, actually I think I was supposed to get beer but…..I forgot," Quil told him.

"Get up. We're going for a ride."

"No….no rides today. Today I'm wallowing. Can you come back later?" Quil pulled his covers back over his head.

"Quil, I'm serious. Get up."

"No," Quil replied stubbornly.

Jacob nodded. "It's going to be like that is it? Well you leave me no choice then." Jacob stomped over to Quil and yanked his covers off the bed.

"Dude, what the hell?" Quil yelled. "I'm trying to be depressed here and I don't need you getting in my face!"

Jacob grabbed Quil's arm and yanked him out of the bed. "I'm not asking you Quil."

"Oh what so now you're going to start throwing around orders? I thought you didn't like to do that Alpha Man."

Jacob didn't respond. He dragged Quil out of the bedroom and down the hallway, pushing him into the living room.

Quil looked around the room, at Nessie who stood looking out the window, at Seth and Embry who were seated on the couch, worry plastered on their faces.

"What?" He snapped at them. "Is this an intervention or something?"

"We're just concerned, that's all," Seth said quietly.

Quil sighed and looked down. "I'm fine," he muttered.

"Quil you aren't fine!" Embry shouted. "You did not see yourself yesterday! Stop being an ass and let us help you!"

"I don't want your help," Quil shot back. "I did what I did and it's done. I can't take it back. I hurt Claire, I betrayed everyone's trust and I just want to be left alone with my misery. Is that so much to ask?"

"Quil," Jacob's voice was soft now. "Just come with me, okay?"

Quil gave a reluctant sigh. "If I come with you now, will you guys promise to leave me alone? I really just want to be alone."

"Let's go," Jacob said.

He pulled Quil out the door to his car and stuffed him into the backseat. Nessie followed behind Jacob, climbing in the front with her husband. She looked over her shoulder into the back. "Hello Quil," She said serenely.

Quil rolled his eyes. "Hey," he muttered. It drove him crazy that Nessie was always so quiet and composed. Maybe he was just used to Claire and her theatrics, but he honestly didn't know how Jacob could stand being with someone who barely spoke two full sentences a day. The thought of Claire caused a new wave of despair to wash over him and he had to clench his fists into tight balls and bite his lip to keep from blubbering like a baby.

Jacob started the car and pulled out of driveway. No one spoke as he drove, although Quil did catch Jacob watching him in the review mirror several times, eyeing Quil as if waiting for him to flip out. Finally unable to stand it anymore, Quil asked. "Where the hell are we going?"

Jacob didn't answer. Nessie smiled back at Quil and then reached over and touched Jacob's cheek. Jacob leaned his head into her palm, a smile on his face.

"Should you be doing that while you drive?" Quil asked snottily. "I mean it's not good road etiquette to be watching home movies while operating a vehicle."

Jacob frowned in the rearview mirror at Quil.

Quil sneered back at him.

Nessie took her hand from Jacob's face and smiled back at Quil again.

Quil looked away, annoyed. "So? You never answered me, where are we going?"

"The park," Jacob replied.

Quil frowned. "You dragged me out of bed to take me to the park? We live in a God damn park why are you taking me to a different one? What are we going sightseeing or something? I mean come on man, this is ludicrous. Just take me home."

Jacob didn't respond.

Quil felt his anger building up. He leaned forward and said. "I could just jump out you know. I don't have to stay in here. It's not like it will hurt me if I jump."

"So jump," Jacob said, his voice exacerbated.

Quil flopped back into his seat. "I don't feel like walking back," he muttered.

Jacob snorted. "It doesn't matter, we're here anyway." He pulled into a small lot and parked.

Quil looked out his window. "We live in the backyard of Olympic National Park and you bring me to Tillicum?" He said disgustedly.

"Nessie likes it here. Charlie used to bring her here when she was little."

Quil made a face. "Whatever," he muttered.

Nessie smiled at Quil and went to touch his face. Quil squirmed out of her way and held up both his hands in a karate chop gesture. "No no I am _not_ strolling down memory lane with you today," he growled.

"Get out of the car," Jacob gave Quil a dirty look.

Keeping a wary eye on Nessie, Quil pulled open his door and stepped out of the car.

"Let's go for a walk," Jacob said.

Quil groaned. "Why do I-"

Jacob held up a hand. "Just shut up and walk."

They walked in silence for some time, making nearly five full circuits of the park before Jacob finally led Quil over to a picnic area and sat down. Quil flopped down next to Jacob, stretching his legs out in front of him and crossing his arms over his chest.

Jacob studied Quil for a moment then said. "You've got to snap out of it."

"Snap out of it? I ruined my life, I probably ruined Claire's life, I said horrible things to two people I really care about, Sam knows I did something really, really bad and uhh oh yeah Claire hates me. I think I've earned the right for a little self pity."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "You know what? You are an ass. I mean the last few months you've been driving yourself crazy back and forth with the 'oh I'm so horrible' crap. Shut up already."

Quil looked at Jacob, shocked. "What did you say?"

"I said shut up," Jacob replied. "I mean really. You are making such a big deal out of this. It does not have to be this big of a deal."

"Claire said the same thing yesterday," Quil said softly. "After we….you know, she said it wasn't a big deal. And I yelled at her." Quil suddenly buried his face in his hands. "I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I'm supposed to be there for her. I've done nothing but push her away. And why? Because I care what everyone else will think? Because Sam and Sharon have both threatened to kick my ass?"

"I talked to Sam," Jacob told him.

Quil dropped his hands and looked up. "You did?" He asked weakly. "What did he say? Is he going to kill me?"

Jacob shook his head. "No, he's not going to kill you. In fact he's going to back off. He and Sharon had a long talk last night after you stopped by Claire's house."

Quil gave Jacob a worried look. "What happened? Do they all hate me?"

"Nobody hates you man! I mean would you listen to yourself? Things got out of control. It happens. Claire told Sharon and Sam it was her fault. That she started it, that you asked her to stop. That you've been telling her to stop, but she wouldn't listen."

Quil's entire chest suddenly felt as though a huge rubber band had been wrapped around it several times, squeezing the breath out of him. He took a shuddering gasp and said, "Why would she do that?"

"Because she loves you!"

Quil shook his head. "She shouldn't. I don't deserve it. I don't deserve her."

"Quil. I want you to answer the question I'm about to ask you. I want you to say the first thing that comes to your mind. Don't think just answer, okay?"

Quil nodded.

"What do you want more than anything in this world?"

"For Claire to be happy," Quil responded immediately.

Jacob smiled. "See? You put her before anything else. Quil, she's lucky to have you. You just need to see that. You need to stop beating yourself up. You need to get past this. And you have to go talk to Claire."

"Jake, you weren't there yesterday. I….was _so_ horrible to her. I mean you should have seen her face. It was like I took her heart, ripped it out of her chest, threw it on the ground and then just like did the fucking riverdance all over it. I don't think she'll ever forgive me, let alone talk to me."

"I never said this was going to be easy, and it probably won't be. But you have to try. If you don't, man, you are going to regret it for the rest of your life."

"God I'm an idiot. I've been such a selfish jerk."

"Jerk, yes. Selfish, no. Quil everything you've ever done has been with Claire's best interest in mind. You drive yourself crazy over being with her because you want to protect her. You've spent so much time making sure that Claire was happy that I sometimes think you forget that part of her happiness depends on _you_ being happy. Are you happy right now?"

"Do I look happy?" Quil muttered.

Jacob made a face. "No, you don't look happy. You look miserable and quite frankly a little disgusting. Did you sleep in a gutter?"

Quil gave him a weak laugh. "Practically. I slept outside the back door of Ruby's."

Jacob laughed. He then looked up and motioned for Renesmee to join them.

Quil made a face. "Please, please, Jake you know I respect your wife and all but I really don't want her touching me."

Jacob lightly smacked Quil's arm. "She just wants to show you why you need to make this right."

"I know why I need to make it right I don't need Sylvia Brown's help," Quil muttered.

"Okay, that's just insulting. Sylvia Brown was a psychic," Nessie told Quil as she sat on the bench next to him. "I am going to show you accurate memories. It is a completely different thing."

"Sorry," Quil said.

"Just relax," Nessie said. She reached forward and cupped Quil's face in her small hands.

Immediately Quil was overwhelmed. Memories rushed at him as though his mind was going in fast forward. Every memory Nessie had of him and Claire swept across his eyes. The most overwhelming thing of all was the amount of love he felt in every memory. Not romantic love, but just pure unadulterated love. The kind of love that was so rare you felt lucky to have it. It was so much to take in that Quil began gasping for breath. He jerked away from Nessie's hands and sat breathing heavily.

"She loves you and you her," Nessie said quietly. "That is what's important."

Quil stood up quickly. "Take me home, I need to see her. Please."

Jacob stood up too. He slung an arm around Quil's shoulders and gave him a reassuring squeeze. "All right. Let's go home."

* * *

Quil, Jacob and Nessie drove back to La Push in silence. Quil sat in the back, his head leaning against his window. His mind kept turning the memories Nessie had shown him over and over. He had no idea what he was going to say to Claire. He didn't even know if she would listen. But he was going to try. He had to try. Jacob had been right. He would regret it for the rest of his life.

Jacob pulled up to Claire's house and put his car in park. "Do you want us to wait for you?" He asked.

Quil shook his head. "No. Either way I'll walk home." He got out of the car, shut his door, then walked up beside Jacob's door and rapped his knuckles on the window.

"What's up?" Jacob asked as he rolled the window down.

"I just wanted to thank you. You've always been a good friend to me. Better than I deserve."

"Don't sell yourself short man," Jacob told him. "You've been just as good a friend to me."

Quil slapped his hand on the top of Jacob's car and then turned to walk up Claire's driveway.

"Quil!" Jacob called.

"Yeah?" Quil looked back at the car.

"Good luck."

"Thanks." Quil gave them a small wave then shoved his hands in his pockets. He took a deep breath and slowly walked up the driveway. As he walked he tried to think of what he was going to say to Claire. He finally decided he would just speak from his heart.

He climbed up the back porch steps and stood at the door. How many times had he just walked in? The last time he knocked was when he picked Claire up for their first date. Tentatively he reached forward and knocked.

The door opened and Sharon looked out at him.

"So, you _are_ alive," she said.

Quil nodded. "Yeah…..physically at any rate."

Sharon looked at him for a moment and then sighed. "She doesn't want to see you."

Quil looked down and shuffled his feet. He had expected this but it didn't make it any easier to hear. "She really hates me this time, doesn't she?" he asked quietly.

Sharon reached behind the door, grabbed her coat off the rack and then stepped outside. "Let's go for a walk."

Quil felt his insides turn into a quivering pile of mush. Sharon didn't even want him in the house. And now he was going to be forced to go on a walk with yet another person who was most likely going to tell him how much of an asshole he was.

"Come on," Sharon said. She walked down the steps and waited until Quil joined her. She then reached over and linked her arm through his. "Let's go to the river."

Quil took a deep breath. "How bad is it?" He asked as they walked.

"Well I won't lie honey. She is really hurt. I've never seen her this upset."

"Jake said she told you and Sam about yesterday. And she took all the blame for it."

"She did."

"God, Sharon I'm so sorry. I mean you even asked when you left if you could trust me and I looked right at you and lied."

"You didn't lie. I wasn't…..thrilled to hear about the details of what happened. Especially coming from my brother-in-law, but Quil, I know this isn't your fault."

"But it is, don't you see? I'm the adult, you said so yourself. I need to be able to keep things from getting to that point. And I don't think I'm strong enough to do it."

"Oh, I know that's not true."

As they reached the Quileute river, Sharon sat on a small log on the river bank. Quil absently scooped up a handful of gravel and began tossing the rocks into the river.

"I can't help but feel that most of this is my fault," Sharon told him. She put her elbows on her knees and rested her chin on her hands.

"Your fault?" Quil turned to look at her.

"Yeah. I thought Claire would be able to handle this." When Quil gave her a questioning look she explained. "Claire's always tried to act more grown up than she is. I think sometimes she manages to fool me and her father into believing she _is_ more grown up. But her actions lately….." Sharon shook her head. "Well honestly I have to say I think I've been a little blind."

"You aren't the only one who's been blind. I mean I knew I wasn't ready to date her yet, but I did it anyway. A part of me did it because I wanted to but I think a bigger part of me did it mainly to please her. All this time I've been afraid that if I didn't give her what she wanted, she'd be mad at me. But now…..I can't help but think that if I had been smarter, I would have said we weren't ready for that yet. The problem now is that it is going to be so hard for me to be with her and not be _with _her. You understand what I'm saying?"

"Believe me I got quite the description yesterday. I understand exactly what you're saying."

Quil shook his head. "No, I don't just mean……I don't just mean sex, although honestly it's getting harder and harder to not think about. It's everything. I've been waiting for so long and I keep saying just a couple more years, you've waited this long, but she keeps doing the things that she does….and now I want everything. I want to be able to hold her hand in public and be able to take her to a stupid dance without worrying about how it will look to other people. I don't know if I'll be able to go back to being the 'big brother'. Not with her. Not when it's like this." Quil looked down at his feet. "Does that make you mad?"

Sharon smiled. "I'm not mad Quil. I know you love her. I also know that you've tried to keep any of this from happening. I'm sorry that I've put you in such a difficult spot that you felt the only way to get out of it was to hurt her."

"I didn't want to hurt her. I swear I didn't. But this has been eating me up inside. Then when I went to see Haley and talk about it….."

"Who's Haley?"

"She's the bartender at Ruby's. She lives in Forks, she's not a member of the tribe or anything. We were….close at one point a few years ago, and while we aren't close in that way anymore, we still talk a lot…."

"What do you mean you were clo…never mind. I get it. Wait, is that even possible? I thought once you wolf guys imprinted you never even looked at another woman."

"Sharon, I was eighteen and waiting around for a toddler to grow up. It didn't mean anything it was just sex. I stopped it a long time ago."

"I'm sorry, it's none of my business either way. Finish what you were saying."

"Well, so I told her you know, about the situation that happened with Claire. And she freaked out on me. I mean she made me feel so horrible. It was like she confirmed everything bad I thought about myself. I just…. I didn't want to feel that way anymore. Unfortunately I took it all out on Claire. That wasn't right." He sighed. "Do you think she'll forgive me?"

"I'm sure she will."

Quil took a deep breath. "Do you think she'll forgive me when I tell her we still can't be together?"

"Are you going to be able to handle that?"

"I have to. You know it's not right. As much as Claire doesn't want to see it, she's going to have to." Quil shrugged. "It's only another year, right? My right fist still works just fine."

Sharon held up her hand. "I love you, but please."

Quil gave her a small smile. "Sorry. I live with Seth and Embry. Jerk off jokes are inevitable."

Sharon stood up and wiped off the seat of her pants. "Well let's go back. She's in her room. You can go up and talk to her."

* * *

"Claire?" Sharon knocked lightly on Claire's bedroom door.

"Mom, I told you I'm not hungry!"

"Honey, Quil's here."

"NO!" Claire shrieked. "I do not want to see him."

"Claire just talk to him for a minute."

"No, I hate him. I don't want to see him, I don't want to talk to him. Make him go away."

Sharon gave Quil a sympathetic look. "I'll go in and talk to her."

Quil shook his head. "No, it's okay. If she doesn't want to see me, I don't want to force her."

"She doesn't mean it you know. She doesn't hate you. I think a lot of this is because her mother and uncle know something intimate about her and she's embarrassed. I think she's blaming you for that."

"No, I was pretty horrible to her last night. I don't blame her for not wanting to talk to me. She has every right to be mad."

"She just needs some time. She'll come around. I promise to make a really good case for you."

"I better go," Quil said quietly. "I'm really sorry about all of this. I never meant for things to be this way."

Sharon patted his arm. "I know you didn't. I'm sorry too. Go on home. I'll work on her."

Quil took a deep breath and nodded. He made his way down the stairs and out of the house. As he stood on the back porch he tried to fight back the tears that he felt building up. He longed for the days when things with Claire had been easy. He remembered again the memories Nessie had shown him, the love he felt in those memories. He prayed that someday soon, he would feel that love again_._


	11. Don't Take Your Love Away

**Well here it is the last chapter. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks again to everyone who read the story and most of all to those few of you who reviewed over and over again:**

**Twinsmom**

**My Best Friend. My Jacob**

**GwevinLoVeR**

**chantelleeenator**

**pinkshirt**

**I believe you five were responsible for pretty much all but a few reviews. So thanks guys! I really appreciate it!!**

**Chapter title taken from the song "Don't Take Your Love Away" by VAST**

* * *

It had been two weeks. Fourteen days. Three hundred thirty six hours. Claire refused to see him. She wouldn't even talk to him on the phone. She used to always threaten him with silence. He would laugh it off because he knew she would never be able to stick to her threats. Except that she was sticking to them this time. And it was killing him. He went to work. He came home. He ate. He slept. He went through the motions of living without really doing it. Now today, fourteen days since Claire last spoke to him, he sat on the couch in his living room. The TV was on, but he couldn't say he was really watching. It was all one big blob of color and white noise.

Another noise began to creep in, something coming from down the hallway, something loud and somewhat annoying. He tried to block it out as it got louder. He focused all of his energy on the TV. _Hmmm figure skating. When did that come on_? Last thing he remembered watching was some stupid movie about some idiot guy losing the girl he loved. That had been good. It had been nice and depressing. Suddenly the annoyance was right in his face. He glared harder at the TV and soon was drifting in thought again as he watched the skaters swirl around the ice.

Julie stormed into the living room, Seth hot on her heels.

"SETH CLEARWATER YOU DON'T OWN ME!"

"I NEVER SAID THAT I DID!"

"WELL THEN STOP TRYING TO CONTROL EVERY ASPECT OF MY LIFE!"

"I'M NOT TRYING TO CONTOL EVERY ASPECT! I JUST WANT THIS ONE THING!"

"Come on guys, don't fight, okay?" Embry bounced around behind Seth, his voice low and pleading.

"WELL I SAID NO! IF I WANT TO SMOKE I'M GOING TO SMOKE AND NOTHING YOU SAY IS GOING TO STOP ME!"

"FINE!"

"FINE!"

"Okay, so now……. make up," Embry added.

Julie turned and glared at Embry. "Shut up! This doesn't even concern you!" She moved to go out the door, but Seth lunged forward and grabbed her arm. "Let go of me," Julie hissed.

"Just listen to me!" Seth dropped Julie's arm and ran a hand over his face. "I'm sorry, okay? It's none of my business. I won't bring it up again. I promise."

Julie crossed her arms over her chest. "Do you swear? Because I hate fighting with you like this."

"I swear. I just can't stand the thought of something happening to you. That's why I keep bringing it up. But I won't anymore. I'm sorry." Seth pulled Julie to him and wrapped his arms around her, kissing the top of her head.

"I'm sorry too. It's stupid I know. How about a compromise. I'll try to cut down. Then you know, maybe I can think about quitting."

"Whatever you want," Seth mumbled into her hair.

Julie took a deep breath. "Okay. Look, I have to go. I'm late as it is. Will you come see me tonight?"

"Of course. I'll call you later." Seth leaned down and gave her a kiss.

Julie pulled away from Seth and walked out the front door.

Seth sighed then turned to Embry. "What the hell man?"

"What?" Embry asked.

"What do you mean what? You following me and Julie around like a little rat terrier nipping at our ankles. Don't fight, make up." He mimicked Embry's pleading voice.

Embry leaned forward and said quietly. "I'm sorry, okay? But the position of household zombie is filled." He jerked his thumb at Quil who was still sitting on the couch, oblivious to any of the drama that had just taken place. "I mean look at him. He hasn't said but two words in nearly a week. It's creepy and depressing. If you and Julie break up, well…..I just can't take another catatonic imprinted person sitting around the house. I just can't."

Seth frowned. "Julie and I aren't going to break up. We had a fight. All couples have fights. If you actually stayed in a relationship longer than two weeks you would know that."

"I resent that," Embry replied indignantly. "I've been seeing Kate for over a month."

"No, you've been trying to get her to sleep with you for over a month," Seth corrected.

"So, what's the difference?" Embry said.

Seth rolled his eyes. "You know what, it's not even worth getting into this discussion with you," he said. He glanced at his watch. "I have to go too. I've got to run and see Jake really quick."

"You're leaving me alone? Here? With it?" Embry glanced quickly at Quil.

Seth shook his head. "You know what? You're an ass. He is your friend. He's in pain. Maybe if you thought about someone besides yourself for a minute you'd realize how much he's hurting right now."

Embry narrowed his eyes. "I know he's hurting. But I don't know what to do about it! What _can_ we do about it? Nothing! There is _nothing_ we can do. So don't get all uppity with me. If you're so worried about him why don't _you_ try something?"

Seth held his hands up. "All right, all right. I'm sorry. I'm just saying…..I realize this is hard on us, but it's even harder on him. We just have to be understanding. That's what he needs right now. Look I really have to go. Just, don't bug him, okay?" Seth patted Embry on the shoulder and left.

"Don't bug _him_?" Embry muttered. "He doesn't even register my presence. I might as well be invisible."

With a sigh Embry flopped into a recliner. He looked over at Quil again and made a face. "Whatcha watching?"

Quil grunted but didn't respond.

Embry nodded. "Sounds good. I'll join you." He looked at the TV and groaned. "Figure skating? Are you kidding me? No one is _that_ depressed." He went to grab the remote, but Quil's growl stopped him. Embry threw his hand into the air. "Sorry, sorry. We'll watch the figure skating. God." After a minute he spoke again. "You know I think I liked you better when you were bitching and moaning. It was at least more interesting than this. Now I'm stuck watching figure skating. I mean who the hell…...wow, did you see that move? How do they do that? I mean those blades are so skinny. I'd be falling on my ass. I wonder how long it takes to learn that. Maybe it's all an illusion, you know? Like maybe they-"

"Oh my God just stop talking," Quil pleaded.

"It speaks." Embry muttered. "Good, I was beginning to think your vocal chords had been severed."

Quil rolled his eyes.

"And facial expressions too. It_ is_ my lucky day. Maybe now you could go shower, cause seriously, you're disgusting."

"You could go away. Then you wouldn't have to look at me," Quil mumbled.

Embry scoffed. "I don't want to go anywhere. It's the stupid high school dance tonight. There are teenagers everywhere. I didn't even think that many kids lived in all of Washington, let alone the greater Forks and La Push areas. It's like a freaking madhouse out there."

"What did you say?" Quil was staring at Embry.

Embry's eyes widened. "I said madhouse _out there_. Out there. Not in here. Not you. I don't think you're you know…" he circled his temple with his finger. "….crazy or anything."

Quil frowned. "Not that. About the dance."

Embry took a relieved breath. "Oh, well it's the Forks Homecoming tonight, sooo…..it's really busy out there."

"Homecoming," Quil repeated slowly.

"Oh God, Quil I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring it up. I know Claire wanted to go. I'm really sorry. It was stupid of me." Embry winced.

Quil shook his head. "No, no, it's not stupid. It's perfect. Homecoming. I'm taking Claire to Homecoming."

Embry glanced around quickly. "Umm, actually, you're not. Remember?"

Quil waved his hand in a negative gesture. "No I know, I remember. I meant I am _going_ to take her to Homecoming."

"Quil, I know you've been kind of out of it but…..Claire's not speaking to you. She wouldn't even take the birthday present you left for her. What makes you think she's just going to go to this dance with you?"

"Because she really wants to go," Quil said firmly. "And I'm going to take her."

Embry pursed his lips. "Umm, okay?"

Quil jumped up. "Don't you see? This is it, this is my gesture."

"I am so lost right now, what the hell are you talking about?"

"My gesture, my grand apology gesture. I'll show up at her house, sweep her off her feet and take her to the dance." Quil nodded. "Yeah, it will totally work."

"What will work?" Seth asked from the doorway, a look of surprise on his face at seeing Quil up and talking.

"He thinks he's going to take Claire to Homecoming," Embry informed Seth.

"No I _am_ going to take her. It's my gesture." Quil suddenly turned and frowned at Seth. "Where have you been? I just had an epiphany and you weren't here to witness it."

"Oh, umm, I just had to see Jake really quick." Seth said quietly.

"Why'd you have to see Jake?"

"Because we've been covering your ass on patrol the last two weeks while you, you know, sat around waiting to have your freaking epiphany." Embry said.

Quil dropped his head. "I'm sorry you guys, I'm really sorry. I know I've been a little….out of it the last couple of weeks."

Seth shook his head. "It's okay man, we know this has been hard on you. No apologies needed."

"I'll take an apology," Embry muttered.

"Well, I am sorry for what it's worth," Quil told him. "Okay, I have to get dressed. I'm taking Claire to Homecoming." He took off down the hallway towards his room.

"TAKE A SHOWER!" Embry yelled after him. He rolled his eyes and looked at Seth. "You think this is going to work?"

Seth shrugged and sighed. "I don't know. But at least it's something."

* * *

Quil took a deep breath. "Well…..how do I look?"

Embry and Seth were sitting on the couch, Quil standing in front of them wearing a faded white dress shirt, a brown tie and baggy khakis.

"Honestly?" Embry raised his eyebrows. "You kind of look like an alcoholic door to door salesman."

Quil groaned and ripped his tie off. "Great. That's just great. This is ridiculous. She's never going to agree to go anyway, so why am I even bothering."

"You don't look that bad," Seth said. He gave Quil an appraising stare. "Well, you might want to think about shaving. You do look a little….scruffy."

Quil huffed and flopped down into the recliner. "Forget it. Who's stupid idea was this anyway? I'm not doing this."

"First of all you have to do this," Embry said. "You're miserable. She's miserable. You owe it to each other to at least be miserable together. And secondly it was my stupid idea and ten minutes ago you said it was perfect."

"Yeah well ten minutes ago I was watching figure skating and enjoying it. Which shows you where my mind set is. Besides Claire won't even talk to me. I've been trying for two weeks. She wouldn't even take my birthday present. Why the hell would she suddenly agree to go to this stupid dance?"

"Because she's in high school. Girls love this crap. Getting all dressed up, dancing, drinking lousy punch. It's like a rite of passage." Embry got a far away look in his eyes. "I remember when I took Megan Goodheart to her senior prom. We got a hotel room in-"

"Could we focus here for a minute please?" Quil begged. "I don't need to hear all about Megan Goodheart and the Best Western breakfast bar again. Okay?"

Embry held up a finger. "They had an awesome breakfast bar. You wouldn't think a hotel like that-"

"Embry!" Seth gave him a dirty look. "Quil, go shave, I'll find one of my ties and Embry….you just sit here and keep quiet."

"Fantastic omelets. I mean they were so fluffy-"

"Can it with the breakfast bar. I have slightly more pressing matters to deal with here." Quil sighed and scrubbed his face with his hands. "For instance, what am I going to say? How am I even going to get her to listen?"

"Tell her 'you're so beautiful, it hurts to look at you'." Embry said.

"You've been watching My So-Called Life again haven't you?" Seth accused.

"Hey man, that was a great show. It's amazing how it stands up over time."

"Better than General Hospital?"

"Don't be ridiculous," Embry growled. "There is no better show than General Hospital."

"Too true," Seth agreed.

"GUYS!" Quil threw his arms in the air. "Please! I need some real help here, some real guidance, not a rundown of whatever fairy ass shows you two watch."

"Quil man, just say what's in your heart. We can't give you a script. Just look at Claire and say whatever it is you feel. Now go. Shave. Embry's right. No offense but you do kind of look like hell."

Quil stood up and glared at his two pack mates. "You guys suck as cheerleaders."

Embry made a face. "I'll have you know I would make a fabulous cheerleader. Besides if I told you that you looked good, well let's be realistic. That would make me a cheerliar."

"Oh my God I live with two utter morons," Quil moaned. He stormed down the hallway and slammed the bathroom door.

"Nice job," Seth said. "Now he thinks I'm a moron too."

"Well if the shoe fits." Embry smiled. "On a serious note. We have got to get that boy some clothes. Something that doesn't scream serial killer. I mean where in the hell did he get this tie?" Embry pinched Quil's discarded tie with his thumb and forefinger, holding it away from him. "You're on ties, I'm on shirts."

"Got it," Seth said, determination in his voice. "We'll make him look so good, Claire will forget why she's pissed at him in the first place."

Embry looked down and sighed. "Do you think she will? You know, forgive him?"

"Let's hope so. I don't know how much longer he's going to be able to take this."

* * *

Six shirts and several ties later, Quil stood on the back porch of the Ortecho home. His heart was pounding so hard he could almost see his shirt rising and falling. He took several deep breaths and tried to get himself under control. When he was sure he wasn't going to vomit, he knocked quietly on the door. It took all his will power not to bolt back to his car. He couldn't remember a time when he had been more nervous than this. He felt as though it might be his last chance, and if it was he didn't want to imagine what life would be like if he blew it.

"Quil," Sharon greeted him quietly. "How are you?"

He shook his head. "Not so good," he whispered.

"Oh honey. I know this has been hard." She held the door open. "Come on in."

Quil stepped inside wringing his hands nervously. "Is she home?" The sudden thought that she might have gone to the dance anyway, possibly gone with another guy even, made his stomach clench into a tight fist.

Sharon nodded. "She is."

Quil cleared his throat. "Do you think….can I see her?"

Sharon looked at him for a moment. "I think that would be a good idea." She said finally.

"Do you want to tell her I'm here?"

"No. I think you should just go up and see her." She grabbed one of Quil's fidgeting hands and squeezed it. "I know she misses you. She won't admit it, but she does. I'm glad you came by tonight."

Quil took a deep, shuddering breath. "Okay. Okay. Well here goes nothing," he tried to smile, but his lips couldn't seem to remember what a smile was supposed to look like. It had been so long since he'd had anything to smile about.

Sharon squeezed his hand one last time and then gestured to the kitchen door. "Good luck, honey," she said softly.

"Thanks." Quil took another breath and then headed through the kitchen to the living room. He paused for a moment at the bottom of the steps to collect himself, then slowly climbed up to the second floor.

Claire's bedroom door was closed, so he rapped on it lightly.

"Come in."

The sound of Claire's voice caused Quil's knees to buckle and he had to support himself on the wall for a moment. It felt like it had been years since he'd heard her voice. He knew he couldn't leave until she forgave him. No matter how long it took. He couldn't live this long without hearing her voice ever again.

He slowly opened her door and peeked in. Claire was sitting at her computer desk, her back to the door. Quil closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Even from across the room he could smell her shampoo and perfume. Every hair on his body stood on end from the rush of actually being in her presence.

He stepped into the room and closed the door softly behind him. "Hey," he said quietly.

Claire spun around in her chair. "What are you doing here?" She snapped. "I can't believe my mom let you up here. Get out!"

Quil held up his hands. "Please, just talk to me, okay? Please?" He begged. "I need you to talk to me."

Claire crossed her arms over her chest. "Well I needed you to talk to me two weeks ago and you ran off like a scared little boy," she spat. "So whatever you have to say now, you can save it."

"Claire," he whispered. "Please. I am so sorry."

"I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I ever loved you." She spun her chair back around to face her desk.

Quil rubbed his eyes and took a tentative step towards her. "Look, you don't have to talk to me, okay? You don't have to talk. But just listen please?"

Claire turned her chair back around and glared at him. "You have two minutes to say what you have to say and then I want you to leave."

"Okay." He walked over and sat on the edge of her bed. He took a deep breath and tried to grab something from the jumble of words running through his brain.

"Clocks ticking," Claire snapped.

_God say something, say anything_ he pleaded with himself. His tongue felt heavy and his entire body trembled.

"I love you," he finally managed to blurt out.

Claire raised an eyebrow. "That's all you've got? Quite frankly I'm disappointed."

Quil shook his head. "No that's not all. God, Claire, I don't even know if I can put into words how horrible these last two weeks without you have been. It has been absolute torture. I feel so dead inside. Without you I am nothing. _Nothing_. I mean nothing makes sense for me at all. I've been going through the motions of living but I'm not living. I am dying. I love you so much it hurts. My chest actually aches when I think about you. I know I hurt you and I didn't mean to."

"Well you did Quil, you did hurt me!" Claire's voice was choked with emotion and tears were leaking from the corners of her eyes. "You told me that you would always be there for me, that you would always protect me, that nothing would ever hurt me if you were there. But who's there to protect me from you? I have never felt more ashamed or betrayed in my life. If you loved me as much as you claim, you wouldn't have hurt me like that."

Quil felt his emotional threshold break. He slid off the bed onto his knees and crawled over to Claire, burying his head into her lap. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. You mean everything to me, you have to believe me. I can't live without you, I don't want to live without you," he sobbed. "You have to forgive me, please, I just, I don't know what to do, just tell me what to do."

Claire put her hands on his face and pulled him up. "Look at me," she said. "I know you love me. I do. But you have got to make up your mind. You can't keep pushing me away like this. You can't tell me you love me one minute, then tell me that you can't be with me the next. It's not fair. I know you think it's wrong for us to be together, I know that you feel bad about yourself when you're with me…"

"That's not true," he exclaimed.

"It _is_ true. I mean God Quil that day in my room, after what happened happened. You should have seen the look you gave me. You looked so sick and disgusted with me, with yourself, it was scary. I don't know why I make you feel that way. I know I'm younger than you, but we are supposed to be together. I've known that since I was a little girl, before I even knew about the imprinting. You are my soul mate and I'm yours. Nothing is going to change that. Not our ages, nothing. I am not a little girl anymore, I am fifteen. I need you to be here for me. I need to know that you aren't going to push me away when things get intense. I need you to be able to talk to me about these things. We are never going to work if you can't talk to me."

Quil nodded. "I know. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I just was so scared. I love you so much and I want to be with you, I do. And I know you don't believe me when I say I want you, but it's true. You have no idea how much I want you. But Claire….."

Claire put her finger on his lips. "Don't say it please, I can't hear you say it again. I can't." She leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. "Please don't say it."

She kissed him again and this time he responded, knotting his fingers in her hair. He kissed her back, his tongue searching for hers, his hands pulling her closer. She slid out of her chair, onto his lap, her arms wrapping around his neck. When he broke the kiss, he pressed his forehead against hers, his breathing ragged.

"Claire," he whispered.

Claire buried her face in his neck. "I know," she cried. "We can't be together now."

Quil held her closer, feeling her tears soak his shirt, his own tears dripping into her hair. "No, we can't," he said softly.

"I love you," she sobbed into his neck.

"I love you too," he said. "It's only a year. Just one more year."

"Okay," Claire took a shuddering breath and nodded. "One more year." She pulled away from his neck and looked into his eyes. "Promise that it's just one more. I don't think I can take much more of this."

Quil pushed her hair back from her face and gave her a small smile. "I promise."

Claire nodded again and then got shakily got to her feet. She wiped her face with the palm of her hand and then gave Quil a strange look. "Why are you wearing a tie?"

Quil looked down at himself. "Oh, I uhhh, I came to take you to Homecoming." He laughed weakly.

Claire smiled through her tears. "After all this you were still going to take me?" She asked softly.

Quil nodded. "I knew how important it was to you. I'll still take you, if you want to go."

Claire shook her head. "No, I mean I don't even have a dress and I think I ruined your shirt." She pointed to his tear stained shoulder.

Quil shrugged. "It's okay it's Embry's."

Claire laughed. "Well then I don't feel so bad."

Quil looked at her. "We don't need have to be at Homecoming to dance you know," he said. He walked over to Claire's stereo and turned it on. He flipped the dial until he found a station playing an old, slow song that he remembered from when he was in school. "Claire Ortecho, will you dance with me?" He held his hand out to her.

She smiled and took his hand, letting him pull her close. Quil wrapped his arms around her and they began to sway to the music. As they danced, he held her tight. He knew the next year would be hard for both of them. But no matter what obstacles they faced, he knew deep in his heart, that they would face them together.

Fin.

A/N: Well I hope you don't think the ending sucked. I kind of thought it might be a little weak, but there wasn't really anywhere else for the story to go. On a side note the song they dance to is "Don't Take Your Love Away" by VAST from the album Nude. Which is a little silly I know because they NEVER play VAST on the radio…..but they should. Either way here are the lyrics if you care!

I am looking for an inspiration  
And I think I found it in your heart  
It's the kind of thing you get when you're not looking  
It's the kind of thing you had from the start

Put me on a ship that is sinking  
On a voyage to an untamed land  
Take away the freedoms I wanted  
I understand

Please, don't take your love away from me  
Don't take your love away from me  
Please don't take your love away from me  
Please don't take your love from me  
Please don't take your love from me

Put me inside flesh that is dying  
A ghost that wanders without rest  
Buried by desires and weakness  
I understand

Please, don't take your love away from me  
Don't take your love away from me  
Please don't take your love from me  
Please don't take your love from me


End file.
